The Fangorious Leap

2006-07-28T10:11:00.000-04:00

You scored as Black Beard. When you finally die and enter Hell, the devil will hand over his reign and bow.

Black Beard

100%

Captain Barbosa

67%

Captain Jack Sparrow

58%

Mary Read

58%

Captain James T. Hook

50%

Long John Silvers

50%

Will Turner

42%

Sinbad

42%

Dread Pirate Roberts

Morgan Adams

What kind of Pirate are you?
created with QuizFarm.com

2006-06-29T16:27:00.000-04:00

These are some awesome t-shirts I found while perusing the vast storeroom of the internet:

Jesus saves

Traveling Snake Apparel

Hello. My name is...

Festivus

Who doesn't like Pho?

I wave my genitals at your aunties!

Not Mohammed

Jewish

And those big bathrooms...

Chain letter

2006-06-20T10:47:00.000-04:00

Post 300!!!! w00t!

In celebration, I have done a picture personality analysis which is shared with you.

in case the analysis doesn't show, as it often doesn't, here it is in all its four sentenced glory:

Your personality analysis based on this drawing:
You think you are very intelligent.You have an evasive attitude in social relations.You sometimes feel powerless.You deny your needs and can be passive aggressive.

Interesting. Who thinks it is accurate?

2006-05-18T13:12:00.000-04:00

Finally, blogger lets me post. The winners for the slogan competition are as follows:

2nd - Doppelganger Effekt significantly changed my life
2nd - DE killed my inner child
2nd - DE is all afterpants
1st - DE defeated Gamera and Mothra

Some awesome/funny stuff I found/came across/was sent to me:

Irish Slang made me laugh.

French D&D theme made me glad I don't watch French TV.

Crash made me cry.

Stadium Arcadium made me happy. Watch the video for Dani California if you get a chance because it is really funny.

2006-04-28T11:22:00.000-04:00

I read about this on OMNI's blog and found it, as ever, quite interesting. You should go read.

2006-04-26T10:46:00.000-04:00

Here are a list of 26 slogans (down from 82) that may eventually be put onto a band t-shirt. Which are your favourites?

1-Doppelganger Effekt significantly changed my life
2-DE ruined my life
3-DE killed Kurt Cobain
4-DE killed my inner child
5-DE destroyed the ring of power
6-DE is the 4th Noble Truth leading to enlightenment
7-DE beat the devil in a fiddle competition
8-DE laughs at gravity
9-DE can cure cancer but won't
10-DE knows the 5-point exploding heart technique
11-DE defeated Gamera and Mothra
12-DE rested on the 7th day
13-DE uses sex as a weapon
14-DE supports the idea of tofu
15-DE eats meat
16-DE composes with a +2 broadsword
17-DE is all afterpants
18-DE is the Danish cartoonist
19-DE is the difference between right and wrong
20-DE doesn't believe in shameless self promotion
21-DE may contain traces of peanuts
22-DE is the other white meat
23-DE wears short shorts
24-DE survived Soddom and Gomorrah
25-DE made genocide a weight loss technique
26-DE is better than the sum of its slogans

2006-04-21T14:17:00.000-04:00

Inspired by Dr. Awesome posting his essay up for the internet to peruse at their leisure, I decided to do exactly the same thing. I wrote my essay in a veritable stupor of questioned consciousness from which I have not yet fully recovered, though I was quite chatty yesterday for some reason. Anyways, here is my essay followed by the pictures/paintings mentioned.

Identity and Globalization in Art: The birth of email art

One of the main issues that plagues and inspires contemporary artists is that of globalization and the creation of one global community with all the cultural, ethnic, linguistic, aesthetic, and, consequently, identity loss that comes with it. In response to these trends, artists, humanists and concerned citizens alike have banded together to protest the entities, legislation and corporations that are making these things accessible, acceptable, and ultimately inevitable. Artists in particular reacted not only as the others, but also by creating a new medium for art, that is email art.

In order to fully understand the motives and actions of the soon to be mentioned artists, we first must understand the context in which these actions were made, in this case, the climate of globalization. First of all, what is globalization? Globalization is a very broad term that is defined differently in every field of study or thought. Essentially what it is, is the free flow of information on a global scale. This in turn results in the mobilization of people, technology and consequently language, religion and culture. These days you can go to any major metropolitan center and find not only people from all over the world speaking their own languages but also designated areas of the city devoted to a particular foreign region (e.g. China town or Little Italy) where the culture is of the home country and not of the host. Anywhere in the world you can eat French Fries, what is considered American food and see people dressed in American style clothing. For this reason, Globalization is sometimes referred to as Americanization or even more specifically, McDonaldization (Rothenberg 2003).

This transplanting and intermingling of culture and language has created much confusion in people. Where personal identity used to be defined by geographic location, language, religion, culture etc, it was now being all jumbled up into one big mass. This led people to wonder how they were to define themselves, what was their real identity and how were they different from everyone else.

Then there was the way in which large corporations and organizations had gained so much power and influence in global affairs that they started being able to impose their way of doing things onto the rest of the world. The most well known protest to this became known as the Battle of Seattle in November of 1999 when thousands of activists flooded the streets to protest the WTO's (World Trade Organization) immoral control over third world debt (Smith 2001). In this protest, many activists (often peaceful) were beaten by riot police, shot with rubber bullets or tear-gassed. The event was highly publicized on all forms of media, most often portraying the protestors as violent insurgents.

An artist by the name of Mark Vallen produced a work entitled Globalization (2000, Oil on masonite, 20" x 26") in which he depicts just such a scene (appendix 1). You can see that all the figures in the painting are completely faceless with no facial features at all visible and in the case of the victim, not even a head present in the work. This shows the artists struggle with the identity of the individual. More than that, this paintingÂs subject matter is one of violence by corporate powers towards those who disagree with them such as that which happened in the Battle of Seattle. The artist says about his painting, "My painting addresses the excesses of state power and tyranny seen all over the world." (Vallen 2006) As can clearly be seen, there are four authoritarian figures with clubs for the one defenceless civilian. The civilian has been beaten with the clubs and kicked to death (evidenced by the blood on the leftmost figureÂs boot) with a graphic depiction of the bloodiness of the crime in the river of blood which the figures seem to dance around in a symbolic denial of the deed, not wanting to get their feet dirty so to speak. This could be depicted anywhere around the world. The background has been obscured by fog, perhaps teargas, thus eliminating any features by which to identify location. This is another way the artist conveys the increasingly undifferentiated nature of our world. Every place has the same concrete streets and the authoritarian figures all wear the same shade of dark blue. This work shows the negative aspects of globalization, that violence toward opposing powerful corporate dealings is universal, excessive and faceless.

Where the last work was made in a more traditional style (with oil paint on a surface), many artists have decided to go beyond the physical world of representation and into the digital one as a more appropriate means to get their point across (use of the internet, a major tool of globalization). The next artists all express themselves through something called email art, which is art shown through email. These works donÂt leave the digital realm and reach their audience through either websites or email and when exhibited, it is via a computer screen. There is some debate as to whether or not this form of art is a valid one since any scan of art can be emailed. Email art can include digital scans, animations, computer graphics etc (Unknown 2006). Also, email artists come from all over the world, yet they are able to view each other's works nearly instantaneously with a few clicks of the mouse via the internet. The global connectivity that makes the art possible, yet speaks so blatantly against it, is very ironic.

In Jean Claude Gagnon's piece (appendix 2) entitled Identidad-Globalizacion (2002, digital scan), we see a table and chair with a question mark superimposed. This table and chair could be from anywhere. The design is not unique, it has no identity. The same chair can be found all over the world and it would look just as at home in any place. The chair is missing a leg, making it unstable. If anyone were to sit on the chair they would fall over and hurt themselves. This is trying to say that the erasure of identity caused by globalization is a disaster waiting to happen and that all may look fine at first glance, but eventually it will collapse and many will be hurt. In the background we see a map of the world with things on top of it. One of these things is what appears to be a blown up newspaper clipping of a manÂs head with a hat, though his facial features can not be recognized. We donÂt know who this man is; he could be any man in any corner of the world which stretches out behind him. Perhaps the one who will try to use the chair and hurt himself or as the title suggests, he is the artistÂs father.

R.F. Cote's piece (appendix 3) called Shredded World (2001, digital scan) shows a satellite image of the world at night with all the lights shining, cut into strips and mixed around on a background. The world has been shredded and mashed back together in an incoherent and unrecognizable form. In the same way that globalization has displaced people and cultures etc, so has the artist displaced pieces of the world in a chaotic manner.

Fianally, Varney's piece (appendix 4), Globalization (2002, digital scan), deals with the concept of the globalization of commodities. It is references mail art which uses regular mail for its basis as opposed to email with the stamp. On the top of each of the attached 12 stamps is written "Mondo Post" with the last "o" in mondo being the copyright symbol (©) and the "o" in post as a smiley face. The © is mocking the copyright laws as per the extent to which they are abused and generally ignored on the internet. The smiley face is a common symbol used in instant messaging via the internet, but it also is a well known reference to the American corporate giant Walmart. Mondo is a website (found at www.cloud9.net/~drs/) that displays articles and opinion pieces on government corruption, deterioration in post-industrial cities, fraud, scams etc. It brings to light things that people in high places probably wouldn't like anyone to see. The most noticeable thing in this work is the cows with the spots shaped like the world. Note that the USA and Canada are positioned in the spot where are all the best cuts of meat are including prime rib, T-Bone, porterhouse and tenderloin steaks, denoting that they are the richest and the ones who will reap all the benefits of globalization.

In conclusion, globalization has had a large impact on many artists from around the world and has led to the creation of new art in traditional forms and to that of email art which remains at all times in the digital realm. The main issue it has raised is that of how identity, or loss of it, affects the artist as a person.

References

Rothenberg, Lawrence E. 2003. ÂGlobalization 101: The Three Tensions of
Globalization.Â The American Forum for Global Education. No. 176

Smith, Jackie. 2001. ÂGlobalizing Resistance: The Battle of Seattle and the Future of
Social Movements.Â Department of Sociology State University of New York at Stony Brook. < http://depts.washington.edu/pcls/Smith.pdf> (April 17, 2006)

Unknown. 2006. ÂEmail Art.Â Wikipedia. < http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/E-mail_art>
(April 17, 2006)

Vallen, Mark. 2006. Mark VallenÂs Site. Art For a Change. < http://www.art-for-a-
change.com/Vallen/vdraw25.htm> (April 17, 2006).

Appendices

1

2

3

4

2006-04-19T14:09:00.000-04:00

I am in shock over some news I've just found about one of the blogs on my blogroll. I only linked it because he had lots of interesting finds in terms of articles, but I never read any of his actual posts. Anyways it turns out this guy murdered a little girl. I'm completely disturbed. It is harder when you came into contact with that person at some point.

2006-04-17T10:24:00.000-04:00

For the past few days I've been completely incapacitated with some unknown illness which seemed to incorporate nearly every symptom known to man. Don't get me wrong, I still feel like crap, but it is a slightly more tolerable sort of crap. I now only have an incessant cough, a recovering sore throat that left a bruise on my neck and a mind in a state of mild delirium. Anyways, the reason for this post was to report 2 things that I found were pretty cool:

1) OK Soda. Why didn't it catch on? This stuff looks awesome.

2) Spy vs. Pie. These guys formed a band where they just sit and talk about anything and everything. It reminded me of the chatter on Bazooka Radio but with words not fit for radio use. Each one is about half an hour, so if you have nothing to do or have earphones and are tied to the computer, give them a listen. Oh, and one of them is Canadian. I think that makes it better.

2006-04-13T12:48:00.000-04:00

Come see Doppelganger Effekt play tomorrow at Rock for Recycling. We'll be hitting the stage at around 12:30 during this 12-5 event to rock the campus for anyone who decides that its a good idea to be within listening distance that early. If it gets all afterpants by the end, I'll consider it a smashing success. This will be a nice warm up show before our big one on the 21st at Le Magog ironically situated in Sherbrooke.

I had a job interview yesterday. It turns out my French sucks. I blame the the English school system and the Cubans for this one. I now highly suspect that Bishop's doesn't have very many happy customers during the summer based on the questions I Was asked during this interview. Judging by these, they over or double bookall of their spaces and have people yelling at them all the time. Complete hackdiggery if you ask me They also told me that they keep their employees on "an elastic leash". Upon revision, I'm glad I didn't get this job.

I have a final exam tomorrow that I really should start studying for. See you all tomorrow.

2006-04-12T09:58:00.000-04:00

I'm not sure I would.

2006-04-10T09:55:00.000-04:00

What do you think of my new word?
Or Dr. Awesome's?

2006-04-07T02:02:00.000-04:00

God bless america. My friend Wang Da told me today that in china they refer to america as "Uncle Sam".

2006-04-04T17:59:00.000-04:00

So, I was just minding my own business, about to leave campus when I ran into Fort Club and this other guy playing hackey sack. He asked me to play and just as I was about to decline because of my rising hunger, they kicked it at me, so I decided to stay for a few minutes and then leave. The first thing out of the other guy's mouth was this:

"So, if you eat someone else, do you think that you become like a superman?"

This was instant captivation for me. Hunger forgotten, I went into a detailed explanation of why this was not so for about ten minutes while playing hackey sack. I/we came to the conclusion after a while that the only way you could gain someone's strength by eating them was to do so and then work out a whole lot to put that protein to good use. If this wasn't interesting/weird enough, we spent the next half an hour discussion the same thing for crabs and reasons why they might become cannibals themselves. In the end, I think I may have started them on the track for a film festival submission. I hope it is realized.

Also...

2006-03-25T11:06:00.000-05:00

From this ultra reliable source comes the first vestiges of hope that warp speed may actually be possible and/or achievable. Of course, it could be from a trekkie just dreaming up things and making them sound plausible (quantum physisist? of course he is a trekkie). But then, here is another more reliable article stating the same thing in more fascinating detail.

In other news, I met this 7 year old kid son of some musicians from the ensemble called Strata (they played a show at Bishop's yesterday and will play another with students on Sunday at 2) who was quite taken by my beard of knowledge and decided to construct his own robotic beard (aka the Kenneth Extension) with nothing but paperclips and elastic bands. This was all kinds of cool and also very funny to see this little man run up to me, point to my face and shout, "BEARD OF KNOWLEDGE!" and either run away or right into me, trying to take me down under the misguided assumption that it was possible. It is unfortunate that I didn't get a picture of him proudly wearing his homemade prosthetic, or making his dad try it on to see how he would look with a beard.

I think it looks rather klingon.

2006-03-16T16:26:00.000-05:00

Here is something you should see if you want an answer to the question that has plagued us (or at least me) for the last 10 minutes: Can counting to infinity ... twice really help Chuck Norris if he were to be up against Gandalf the Grey and White at the same time?

Yeti Crabs. Interesting.

2006-03-15T00:01:00.000-05:00

I am a Windows person. I don't like Macs. They don't work for me. I like the customizability of Windows and the fact that everything works for me when I use it and when it doesn't it is because of something stupid I did (mishaps rarely happen) and even then it is always relatively simple to fix. Anyways, the point of this post is to show you some nice videos found on Google Video:

1 - Why Macs Suck

2 - Why Macs Suck (a different one)

3 - A Mac User

4 - I Switched To Mac (I love using that view, used to do it with the film company)

2006-03-13T22:26:00.000-05:00

How interesting this victimless meat concept is, and a little scary also. I was just perusing the internet and its wealth of information and it stumbled upon myself.

I tried to run but I
could not seem to flee
from the cage
of this word stage.
The verbs have taken me!

2006-03-10T17:21:00.000-05:00

So, I'm at the computer lab just waiting around until practice and reading some awesome web comics when I get an instant message from Ilana asking me if I'm at home:

Chilana says:
You're home?
Sam says:
no
Sam says:
the lab
Chilana says:
Which lab? I'm in the lab!
Sam says:
hamilton one
Sam says:
right behind you [as he looks behind him and spots her instantly]
Chilana says:
I have absolutely no idea where that is. [she said as she scanned the room as I watched]

At this point I walked the 7 feet over to her and tapped her on the shoulder and she let out a yelp. I turned around, walked back to my seat and typed:

Sam says:
right here
Chilana says:
Wow.
Chilana says:
I can't believe I didn't notice you.

Neither did I. After one whole year, she doesn't recognize my right side. I guess I have started to look like the typical Bishop's student.

2006-03-09T10:08:00.000-05:00

"I'm sure most of you have already heard about this in one form or another, but I will take this time to make sure that everyone does. Alice Through the Looking Glass, directed by Michael Kennard, will be presented tonight and every night this week at Studio theatre at 8pm for the shockingly reasonable rate of 10$. Be there, or I'll hunt you down and eat your liver."

There you have it in The Bruce's own words. Personally, I'd rather not have my liver eaten, so I will go see the play on Saturday night. Anyone who would like to join Ilana and I are welcome to notify me in the comments. Also, there will be a concert on Friday night that Dr. Awesome/Captain Zoom/Bazooka Chris and I will be attending featuring the Pocket Dwellers. They are up for a Juno for best new band this year even though their first album came out in 2000. Can anyone explain that to me in simple, small words? Tickets for this one are $5 if you buy in advance from the scalpers around campus or Dolittles or $10 if you are supremely lazy and/or coerced into going and just show up at the door.

This post brought to you by Sam's Weekend Plans. Making your weekend more enjoyable than Killer Robots From Venus since 2003.

2006-03-08T23:08:00.000-05:00

I present to you lucky readers of The Fangorious Leap the best quote you will ever find in a finance lecture. I am not able to make something like this up. Ok, so I am definitely able to, but I didn't this time.

"Oh no, I am so foolish. I was pressing the power button [of the remote control for the projector] instead of the one for the supercharged laser. I have to be careful not to burn the screen or cut the wall behind it. Not for our sake, for the people in the next class. 'Oh no! The aliens are coming!' 'No, no, it is just the finance class next door.' So, what happens if we add taxes back into the equation?"

It was the best moment in finance class history.

2006-02-22T23:13:00.000-05:00

L i n k s
I hate the PETA.

"Team Canada has lost their mojo." he said as he dismissed the class. "Go home and mourn."

2006-02-21T14:55:00.000-05:00

Interesting guitars/basses:

1, 2 & 3

Quotes from todays classes:

"In art we try to get as close to real as possible, but once we get there, it disturbs us." I love art history.

"I'm just making these up, guys." As he writes a long list of references on the board for us to copy down in MIS. I could have sworn he was drinking booze in class today: tiny sips from a clear plastic beer cup. He's not even trying to hide it in his usual travel mug anymore.

This week is sucking so far. My brain is full from study, I just hope it doesn't empty by the time the test(s) roll(s) around.

2006-02-16T21:58:00.000-05:00

I have 3 midterms next week in a 2 day span. Does that sound like it will be enjoyable to you? If so, I propose we switch places. No? Bollocks!

Quote of the day: The masses have their heads on backwards. If you want to get things right, first look at how they think and behave, and consider going the opposite way. - Lama Drom Tonpa, 11th century

2006-02-15T10:08:00.000-05:00

Here are some anti-valentines that I made and gave to people yesterday. They are a bit hard to read partly because they are done in pencil and partly because I am a messy writer/artist.

2006-02-14T16:45:00.000-05:00

I think that if MATT DOELL! and STEVE HOLT! ever got together, fun would be had by all.

Quote of the day: "This looks like a good place to stash myself." Spoken like a true addict.

2006-02-14T09:44:00.000-05:00

Happy Anti-Valentine's Day! To celebrate I've posted all the "nice" things Google has to say about me in their googlism service.

sam is no stock analyst
sam is dead test a
sam is no "change agent"
sam is calling
sam is listening
sam is dead * written by james and lincoln collier
sam is a bastard
sam is carbon neutral
sam is dead @web english teacher
sam is not your dad
sam is expected to make
sam is back
sam is out to get you
sam is the greatest homepage
sam is beautiful
sam is dead journal questions
sam is stuck in the gulf without a compass
sam is home
sam is stupid and so he shall die
sam is hooked on search and seizure and just can't stop it
sam is dead by james lincoln collier &
sam is xbox bound
sam is leading in r
sam is
sam is dead at
sam is a chinese spy
sam is the stuff this doll is made of
sam is footing the
sam is near impossible 05
sam is nation's most
sam is dead answer key
sam is smarter than you
sam is in houston
sam is you need to know the history of
sam is beloved
sam is dead
sam is now america's no
sam is evidently feeling the heat
sam is calling by david balto
sam is carbon neutral Â® massnahmen zur reduktion der co 2 emissionen der sam sustainable asset management page 2
sam is carbon neutral Â® sam sustainable asset management targets to reduce co 2 emissions page 2
sam is this company's rich uncle
sam is dead james lincoln lincoln collier christopher collier
sam is dead by james lincoln collier
sam is not your dad the separation of church and state
sam is a little disgusted
sam is expected to make and make it quick
sam is killing child
sam is dead by
sam is dead general administration
sam is trying to kill you
sam is dead collier & collier honor
sam is dead author
sam is a killer
sam is pissed
sam is the worst drug fiend in the world
sam is for you
sam is saving us from ourselves
sam is in big trouble
sam is a mean jerk who hates me
sam is hooked on forfeiture and seizure and just can't stop it
sam is dead by james lincoln collier & christopher collier
sam is my father
sam is xbox bound available for the xbox later this year
sam is uncle sam's new f
sam is a real vip
sam is watching you
sam is facing a busy year
sam is sexy
sam is really sexy
sam is evil
sam is a chinese spy that supposed american using the nick
sam is usually portrayed with a goatee
sam is no sham
sam is buying
sam is the stuff this doll is made of by detroit news staff reports and wire services
sam is footing the bill
sam is a dolt
sam is missing a story arc
sam is dead by author?s name
sam is de
sam is near impossible
sam is here
sam is nation's most damaging environmental villain washington
sam is dead mapping activity
sam is everywhere
sam is beloved all over the world
sam is dead by jl collier and c
sam is dead by james lincoln collier and robert collier
sam is now the world's #1 drug pusher
sam is also a published author
sam is dead test a
sam is no "change agent"
sam is carbon neutral
sam is dead @web english teacher
sam is calling
sam is just upset that
sam is hunting and just shot
sam is dead * written by james and lincoln collier
sam is dead journal questions
sam is back
sam is expected to make
sam is killing child
sam is on the injured list
sam is out to get you
sam is not your dad
sam is a bastard
sam is watching you
sam is the greatest homepage
sam is saving us from ourselves
sam is a killer
sam is home
sam is stupid and so he shall die
sam is buying
sam is my father
sam is hooked on search and seizure and just can't stop it
sam is
sam is dead at
sam is a chinese spy
sam is this company's rich uncle
sam is no sham
sam is in houston
sam is xbox bound
sam is smarter than you
sam is near impossible 05
sam is now america's no
sam is here
sam is a dolt
sam is nation's most
sam is an asshole
sam is way hot
sam is indeed more beautiful in person than on tv
sam is slider
sam is pissed
sam is beloved
sam is dead
sam is dead
sam is no Âchange agent
sam is hiring
sam is raising the child
sam is carbon neutral Â® massnahmen zur reduktion der co 2 emissionen der sam sustainable asset management page 2
sam is carbon neutral Â® sam sustainable asset management targets to reduce co 2 emissions page 2
sam is dead at web english teacher
sam is dead by
sam is dead general administration
sam is no stock analyst
sam is calling by david balto
sam is able to imply moral corruption even to the extent of pedophilia
sam is a little disgusted
sam is expected to make and make it quick
sam is dead collier & collier honor
sam is dead as a reguired historical fiction book
sam is trying to kill you
sam is not your dad the separation of church and state
sam is dead author
sam is the worst drug fiend in the world
sam is listening
sam is my father man alive
sam is for you
sam is a mean jerk who hates me
sam is hooked on forfeiture and seizure and just can't stop it
sam is facing a busy year
sam is everywhere
sam is a chinese spy that supposed american using the nick
sam is usually portrayed with a goatee
sam is no stock analyst sam is dead test a sam is no "change agent" sam is calling sam is listening sam is dead * written by james and lincoln collier sam is a
sam is here to stay
sam is xbox bound take
sam is near impossible
sam is now the world's #1 drug pusher
sam is dead
sam is dead projects
sam is no "change agent"
sam is listening

2006-02-11T13:17:00.000-05:00

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
...
Ahhhhhh...

2006-02-05T22:22:00.000-05:00

How do you pronounce your name?
What?
I was looking it over last night and I couldn't figure it out.
______
Oh, I knew you weren't French. Where do you come from?
Romania (he said with an embarassed smile)
Oh ... I knew you weren't French.

2006-02-04T14:34:00.000-05:00

Here is a great poem Etienne showed me:

Au Bord du Léthé
Clark Ashton Smith

Les pétales des vieux pavots,
Et les boutons des lys perdus,
Au bord du Léthé sont déchus
Pour joncher le fleuve sans flots.

Là se fanent des anémones,
Des lys tigrés, et des muguets,
Leurs pâles fleurs, leurs fruits violets,
Là tombent près des belladones.

Et là gisent les floraisons
D'automne, sous les vents sans trames;
Et là, des funestes jusquiames
Mêlent aux pensées leurs fleurons....

Et tous mes amours, tous mes mots,
Et tous mes rêves, disparus,
Au bord du Léthé sont déchus
Pour joncher le fleuve sans flots.

Here is the google translator's version for those of you who don't read French. It doesn't really translate well though, quite terribly actually, to the point of humour.

At the edge of Léthé
Clark Ashton Smith

The petals of the old poppies,
And the buttons of the lost lilies,
At the edge of Léthé are deposed
To strew the river without floods.

There anemones, striped lilies fade,
And lilies of the valley,
Their pale flowers, their purple fruits,
Là fall close to the belladonnas.

And there flowerings Of autumn lie,
under the winds without screens;
And there, with disastrous the jusquiames
With the thoughts their florets Mix....

And all my loves, all my words,
And all my dreams, disappeared,
At the edge of Léthé are deposed
To strew the river without floods.

No yelling in the comments about the translation please.

2006-01-23T23:43:00.000-05:00

The results aren't quite all in yet, but I think I did pretty good in the traditional family election seat competition, tentatively winning 4 prizes out of a possible 5. The competition is to guess the number of seats each party will win and the one closest to the actual number wins a prize for each party. Here were my predictions and the prizes:

Conservative: 125 (small tub of vanilla ice cream because they are bland, unoriginal and a little bit cold)
Liberal: 92 (no name strawberry twists because they are cheap, they are red faced and they are slightly twisted)
Bloc Quebecois: 51 (block of P'tit Quebecois cheddar split in half because they are from Quebec and they want to break apart)
New Democratic Party: 35 (No Name brand dill pickle chips because somehow you can make the initials NDP in there. It was a bit unclear for me also my sister is a die hard dill pickle chip fan)
Other: 3 (the bag of mixed nuts is self explanatory)

As it stands now, or when I last looked, I won all the prizes but that for the Liberals. Oh, and we came in second after The Water Solubles in the battle of the bands on Saturday. w00t! Was uber fun.

Overheard quote of the day: "Yeah, well, that's because Mother Nature is a big, crazy, old b****!" Such enlightening things you hear around campus these days.

Update: After all the votes have been counted, it turns out I only won the cheese and the ice cream. Oh, and a guitar pick for getting the Bloc number exactly right. Hahaha, so much fun.

2006-01-11T20:27:00.000-05:00

I've started school and it looks like I'm going to have some great courses, some hard courses and some really great teachers. My favorite professor this semester teaches Modern Art From 1950. Every word that comes out of that man's mouth is gold as far as I'm concerned. He also has the best accent of all time and space: Part Montrealais and part Parisian. Another of my professors whom I have not taken a course with so far has turned out to be a very funny man even though he teaches Finance II. Today in class we were talking about corporations and Heinz came up. Out of nowhere this six-foot-plus well dressed near Spock look-a-like (he had a thicker jaw) said this: "It is a bit embarrassing, but I actually like baby food." He never smiles though. He seems like an interesting man. Another of my teachers is Profe- *Ahem* Doctor Miller. Enough said.

Oooooh, I got my pocket-watch in the mail today all the way from Hong Kong. I think it is pretty cool. I got a pocket-watch because my wrist versions kept breaking. It looks like this:

2005-12-17T19:41:00.000-05:00

I heard the best song on the radio this evening. It was called They're Coming To Take Me Away, Ha-Haaa. It made me giggle so I thought I'd at least share the lyrics with y'all. It also reminded me of Electronic music for some reason.

Remember when you ran away and I got on my knees and begged you not to
leave because I'd go berserk?? Well...
You left me anyhow and then the days got worse and worse and now you see
I've gone completely out of my mind.. And..

They're coming to take me away, ha-haaa!!
They're coming to take me away, ho-ho, hee-hee, ha-haaa
To the funny farm. Where life is beautiful all the time and I'll be
happy to see those nice young men in their clean white coats and they're
coming to take me away, ha-haaa!!!!!

You thought it was a joke and so you laughed, you laughed when I had said
that loosing you would make me flip my lid.. RIGHT???
I know you laughed, I heard you laugh, you laughed you laughed and
laughed and then you left, but now you know I'm utterly mad... And..

They're coming to take me away, ha-haaa,
They're coming to take me away, ho-ho, hee-hee, ha-haaa.
To the happy home. With trees and flowers and chirping birds and basket
weavers who sit and smile and twiddle their thumbs and toes and they're
coming to take me away, ha-haaa!!!

I cooked your food, I cleaned your house, and this is how you pay me back
for all my kind unselfish loving deeds.. Huh??
Well you just wait, they'll find you yet and when they do they'll put you
in the ASPCA, you mangy mutt!!! And...

They're coming to take me away, ha-haaa.
They're coming to take me away, ho-ho, hee-hee, ha-haaa.
To the funny farm, where life is beautiful all the time and I'll be happy
to see those nice young men in their clean white coats and they're coming
to take me away, ha-haaa!!!
To the happy home, with trees and flowers and chirping birds and basket
weavers who sit and smile and twiddle their thumbs and toes and they're
coming to take me away, ha-haa!!!
To the funny farm, where life is beautiful all the time... (fade out)

These lyrics were found here.

2005-12-04T17:12:00.000-05:00

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

When Vin Diesel goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.

Note: some of the other facts can be a bit crude, beware when clicking on the links. Oh, and by the way, Vin Diesel can divide by zero.

2005-11-12T12:33:00.000-05:00

Look at all those superballs!!!

Life, life... This one is for you, Steve. Reminds me of Woody Allen.

Funally, for you reading pleasure, maybe:

Beverly was driving down the street in a sweat because she had an important meeting and couldn't find a parking place. Looking up toward heaven, she said "Lord, take pity on me. If you find me a parking place I will go to Mass every Sunday for the rest of my life and quit drinking."

Miraculously, a parking place appeared. Bev looked up again and said, "Never mind. I found one."

2005-10-29T11:45:00.000-04:00

Here is an article about the blues that you all should read even if you don't like blues, the particlular singer in question or the newspaper it is in because it is just too great a read to pass up. Oh, and be careful if you are ever near any French pop charts because apparantly they are under seige (hehehe). I, for one, can't believe they put that quote in there since it is obviously a joke and since when does the National Post have a sense of humour?!? Riddle me this!

2005-10-20T22:43:00.000-04:00

Continuing with the current trend, Canada has taken a giant symbolic leap by announcing its newly created semi-demi-hemisphere project in which it attempts to differentiate itself geographically from the USA, officially excusing itself from North America. "Something had to be done" said spokesperson for the project, Gerald McCauley "They were becoming a little more elephant than we could handle and/or want to be associated with." ...

Apparently the government is trying to cover this up so as to save relations with the US. The source site has crashed, or is at least no longer accessible, which is a real shame as these guys are awesome. Spread the word, support the cause! I vote we name our new semi-demi-hemisphere the Quarter Dome of Cool. Other names welcome in the comments. I'll see if I can find McCauley's email and send him the list.

2005-10-10T23:52:00.000-04:00

I think Blogger is actively trying to keep me away from this blog. Everytime I go to update I am not able to get access for some reason. Anyways, I am in the process of building a trebuchet (not the French one, the other kind, the one on wheels instead of the sissy rocking chair model as told by Senor Soupe's Dad who was kind enough to give us some nails for the project because he'd seen one built on TV and wanted someone to build one and teach those Frenchies* a lesson on how to build a trebuchet ... or something) with Dr. Snowman. We are building one for the following reasons:

Reason the first: We can.
Reason the second: Who doesn't want a trebuchet?
Reason the third: Teach those French*-wrong-trebuchet-builders how to do it properly trhough lack of technique and guesswork for Senor Soupe's dad.
Reason the fourth: If we don't build a trebuchet who will?
Reason the fifth: To prove to someone who may care that we are not good for nothing loafers that never do anything productive (I'm not sure this will help our case)
Reason the sixth: So we can say when asked what we did on the weekend, " I watched some TV, ignored homework, built a trebuchet, played some music ... you know, the usual."
Reason the seventh: Trebuchet is fun to say, so why not build one.
Reason the eighth: It would look cool in the back yard doing nothing.
Reason the ninth: Want to see if we can hit Senor Soupe's house with a pumpkin without actually moving too much.
Reason the tenth: We can.

With any luck we will be instilling terror in the hearts of many with our seige weapon within a few weeks. If anyone wants to see it, just knock on the green door twice, say the password, give one of us $10 and then we'll decide if you are worthy or not.

I'm also reading Harry Potter at the moment. Bye all you trebuchetless people. Don't stay too jealous too long. Oh and beware, terror may well be instilled in your heart if are among the many, which statistically speaking, you probably will be. Consider yourselves warned.

*This is a term of endearment. We here at the Fangorious Leap like the French and all those who speak the great language and don't care if they made up the word for something the Chinese invented long before France was even a notion in a seamonster's kin of a king**.

**Some parts of this statement may have been made up or repeated out of context.

2005-09-14T22:27:00.000-04:00

Someone drowned from my school today because of some rugby initiation ritual jumping off bridge tradition. So pointless. I learned today about how Globalization is as good, if not more so, than it is bad, just not for certain individuals. I learn lots of awesome things. Blogger hates me. It won't let me log on unless I trick it into letting me on it's site. I should be reading. And definitely not typing. X-ray on Friday. I hate pain, especially when it is constant and excruciating. Meds help a little.

Sporadically, Sam

2005-09-10T10:58:00.000-04:00

This is disgusting. Speaking of disgusting, the prices of the books I have to buy for school this year are outrageous. Maybe more to come.

2005-08-24T21:49:00.000-04:00

I have compiled a small list of things I wish were on Froogle but aren't, but got stuck on number 6 as there are few things that aren't already on Froogle. Nevertheless, here it is:

Things that should be on Froogle but aren't:

1) Narrator Ball
2) +2 Sword of Stealth
3) Man bathroom sign
4) Morphine ampoules
5) Chinese fighting fish
6)

You see? No six. Nothing came. If anyone has any ideas, please post them in the cmments and I will update the post as ideas are presented.

These nice little gems were sent to me by a dear friend some of you may know as Adam.

FOUNDATIONS OF ARITHMETIC
By J.A. Lindon

One day when Mugg the Missing Link was prowling through the woods,
In search of wives and mammoth-meat and other usefull goods,
Whom should he see, on pushing out from deep arboreal shade,
But Ogg, the Paleolithic Man, cross-legged in a glade.

This Ogg had made a neat array of pebbles on the ground,
In number they were twenty-one, the most that could be found,
And Ogg, with one red-hairy hand pressed to his bony brow,
Was staring at hese pebbles like a ruminating cow.

o o o o o o o
o o o o o o o
o o o o o o o

Thought Mugg - for he was Primitive - I should be very dull
To lose this opportunity of busting in his skull;
My club weighs half a hundredweigh, he doesn't wear a hat
(And here he wondered) Yes, but what the devil is he at?

For Ogg was touching pebbles and then prodding at his digits,
Until the weirdness of it all afflicted Mugg with fidgets:
"Invented any goodish wheels just recently?" he hollered,
And doubled up in merriments, his face raw-beefy coloured.

Ogg looked at him in pity, then he drummed upon his chest:
"I've don a Think!" he bellowed "Monkey Mugg. I've done a think!
And I would write it down, but no one's yet invented ink."

Mugg moved a little closer, and his eyes and mouth were round,
And stared in trepidation at those pebbles on the ground.
Ogg pointed with a nailed red-hairy sausage at the rows
And said, "Three people's hand-plus-two is hand-plus-feet-plus-nose."

oooo oooo oooo oooo oooo
o + o + o = o o + ooooO Oooo + A
o o o
o o o

"And this is hand-plus-two of people's three-for-each-by-name,
So three times hand-plus-two and hand-plus-to time three's the same!"
Mugg scratched his matted hairy head, not knowing what to say.
Said Ogg, "It's all made clear by this rectangular array."

o o o
o o o
o o o o o o o o o o
o o o o o o o = o o o
o o o o o o o o o o
o o o
o o o

"Three rows of hand-plus-two and hand-plus-two short rows of three
are just the same according to which way you look, you see?
In brief, a tripe heptad is the same as seven trebles,
And may quite possibly be true of other things than pebbles."

Mugg viewed it from all angles, then he gave a raucous belch
And trod on a Batrachian that perished with a sqelch.
He growled, "I do not understand these arithmetic quirks,
But maybe we should try to discover if it works."

So home they went to get their wives and drag them by the hair,
For Mugg had feet-plus-hand-plus-four, while Ogg had just a pair;
But what with all their screeching and their running every way,
At first they would not form a neat rectangular array.

So Ogg he then positioned each by holding of her down
While Mugg with mighty club in hand, just dinted in her crown;
And when they had them all in place, like pebbles, they could see
That three times hand-plus-two in wives was hand-plus-two times three!

o<= o<= =>o =>o o<= o<= =>o

=>o o<= o<= =>o o<= o<= =>o

o<= =>o =>o o<= =>o o<= =>o

Then Ogg he roared in high delight, cartwheeling to and fro
(Carts had not been invented, but he did it just to show!),
And Mugg he grinned a shaggy grin and slapped a hairy thigh
And said, "It's true, as sure as Pterodactyls learned to fly!"

And then they feasted on their wives in unuxorious zest,
Exept for one whose skull was rather thicker than the rest,
And she was sent to dig a pit and bury every bone,
While Mugg and Ogg went off to find a flat unsullied stone.

Then Ogg he sharpened up a flint and scratched upon the rock:
First Arithmetic Theorem - by Ogg the son of Mok.
He drew his little diagram, and proved, with QED,
That three times hand-plus-two of x is hand-plus-two times three.

But Mugg the Missing Link grew bored, and left him there alone,
Still scratching with his silly flint upon his silly stone;
And belching, plunged back in the woods on feet toe's simple fives,
In search of wives and mammoth-meat, particularly wives!

Practical Mathematical Application:

He's teaching her arithmetic,
He said it was his mission,
He kissed her once, he kissed her twice
and said, "Now that's addition."

As he added smack by smack
In silent satisfaction,
She sweetly gave the kisses back
and said, "Now that's subtraction."

Then he kissed her, she kissed him,
Without an explanation,
And both together smiled and said,
"That's multiplication."

Then Dad appeared upon the scene and
Made a quick decision.
He kicked that kid three blocks away
And said, "That's long division!"

This one is for HaMekashef, or whatever he is calling himself these days.

A graduate student at Trinity
Computed the square of infinity.
But it gave him the fidgets
To put down the digits,
So he dropped math and took up divinity.

More can be found here.

2005-08-22T13:21:00.000-04:00

Micronomicon.

2005-08-20T16:03:00.000-04:00

Pretty Canadian
You scored 90 Canada speak and 82 Canadianess!

You know a lot about us. You probably know someone who owns a Ski-Doo up at their cottage.

My test tracked 2 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 66% on Canada speak
You scored higher than 52% on Canadianess

Link: The Ultimate Canadian Test written by echox2 on Ok Cupid

2005-08-18T17:16:00.000-04:00

My pirate name is:

Dirty Sam Kidd

You're the pirate everyone else wants to throw in the ocean -- not to get rid of you, you understand; just to get rid of the smell. Even though you're not always the traditional swaggering gallant, your steadiness and planning make you a fine, reliable pirate. Arr!

Get your own pirate name from fidius.org.

2005-08-02T11:40:00.000-04:00

I have tendonitis, so this post will be short as typing isn't exactly great for it. At least I have the week off work. Everyone should go see the play called The Bald Soprano starting on the 5th (thats when I'll be going) at the studio theatre. Most of my drama buddies are in it and it should be awesome. If you can, and want to, you should get tickets for the System of a Down show in Montreal. My seats are way up in the grey section, but it should still be awesome. I'll bring a telescope or something. I hear they are going to fix the bridge near Bishop's, you know, the one that has gaping holes patched up with road signs on the sidewalk part. They are going to start fixing it in September when all the students return. Anyone else find this idea a mind-numbingly bad one? They have over a month until school starts. Fix it now. Sam.

2005-07-20T18:35:00.000-04:00

The Quiz found on Ilana's blog.

Take the What High School
Stereotype Are You? quiz.

They say blondes have more fun. Go us.

2005-07-03T21:22:00.000-04:00

I watched Ninja of the Magnificence today. It is now officially the worst movie I have ever seen. Seven bulleted points showing what was wrong with this movie:

1) The lack of coherent plot
2) The extraneous subplot with british ninjas (all having headbands proclaiming them to be so) made the movie appear as if it were actually two movies spliced together after someone lost a bunch of original footage
3) Afore mentioned British actors wearing ninja costumes of colours such as mauve and daisy yellow
4) The pointless scenes of rocks and flowerbeds lasting 30+ seconds where nothing actually happens
5) The ninjas use samurai swords (minor but valid)
6) The entire plot (or what there was of one) was summarized on the back, including the end
7) The entire movie was dubbed even though all the actors were speaking english

I'm embarassed to say that this was a Canadian film.

2005-06-27T17:00:00.000-04:00

The rubber today smelled like burning goat's cheese. I have my suspicions that the white flecks in the sheets were exactly that but I wasn't about to taste and find out for sure.

2005-06-19T13:54:00.000-04:00

As found on Steve's blog, reposted with permission:

A Tale of the Sitra Ahra

I will walk with sincerity of heart within my house.
I will set no worthless thing before my eyes;____
I hate the doers of evil deeds;______________
they shall not remain with me.______________
A crooked heart shall be far from me;_________
I will not know evil._____________________
- Psalm 101____

Once upon a time, in the kingdom of Goetia (on Sitra Ahra, North of Gan Hinom) there was an Asmodean who thought it would be amusing to visit all the tribes of the Shedim Iehudaim & make a census of all their fools.

In this irreverent spirit she left from the Asmodean capital in Amaymon, taking with her as many rolls of scroll as her dragon steed could carry. Within a few hours, she had flown over the Amaymonite countryside & landed in the county of Marbas. There, she harangued the people – making a joke of their politics, & calling their leonine accent barbarous. Before long, the masses of the Marbasites were outraged & chased her out of every one of their towns. Content with having recorded the names of those she had insulted, the Asmodean thought she would move on to the territory of a greater power.

Thus she travelled to the court of the Andrealpheans, where she mocked their pride, their feathers, & their sacred Art of Geometry. The distinguished crowd of learned men was severely flustered, so much that she barely escaped with her life – though she did take the time to write the names of her many victims.

Even more confident in her genius, the Asmodean went to Orobas, to Berith & to Buné – & every time got a very similar response. One day she grew tired of the duchies & decided to try her luck at a kingly court. Thus she flew to Peor, to the House of Balaam, & ridiculed their divinatory arts. She offended the seers & the sorcerers so much that furious magic shook the courtroom while she made her escape.

But just before she passed the threshold in haste, she noticed a peculiar raven-headed hominid sitting by the door, quite unmoved. On her way out she called to him – “why, are you not outraged?”

“No,” the he-demon said quite calmly, “I know that for all your cleverness, you would never dare to try your tricks where it really matters.”

Nearly forgetting the crowd behind her, the Asmodean laughed heartily, & said – “& where would that be?” To which the stranger replied “I am but an Amonite, but I know the Arts well. I will take you there.”

The next moment, the Asmodean found herself back in her native House of Asmoday, with the Amonite at her side. “Now, will you not also enlist your kind in the legion of fools?” he said, “Work your mischief! Look here – is that one's fleece not ridiculous? There! Are this one's horns not crooked?” The Asmodean nobles fumed, yet even though it was the Amonite who spoke, it is after their sister that they raged – for such is the Amonite gift to procure & to appease feuds.

Thus the scoffer, flanked by her brethren, begged for mercy before the Great Asmoday – but there is no mercy in Sitra Ahra, & her death was a long & painful one.

An interesting story. I like it.

2005-06-16T22:27:00.000-04:00

I think I will soon read the book titled "Infinite Jest" by David Wallace. Anyone heard of it? He writes exactly as I do/would! It is awesome, at least the first 6 pages were.

2005-06-07T21:29:00.000-04:00

So We'll Go no More a Roving

So we'll go no more a roving

So late into the night,

Though the heart be still as loving,

And the moon be still as bright.

For the sword outwears its sheath,

And the soul wears out the breast,

And the heart must pause to breathe,

And Love itself have rest.

Though the night was made for loving,

And the day returns too soon,

Yet we'll go no more a roving

By the light of the moon.

George Gordon Lord Byron (1788-1824)

2005-06-04T12:10:00.000-04:00

Yes, it is true, I actually do work in a rubber factory moulding mud flaps. It is a very hard job and I come home physically exhausted everyday. Hopefully I will become accustomed to it soon. It pays pretty well, though. I made about $10.44 an hour (paid per piece with a floor of $9/hour) yesterday. Interesting thing though, I work entirely with people who don't speak my mother tongue. If they aren't French, they are Spanish. One good thing, I may get a lot better at French and maybe even pick up some spanish (I learned that guero means leather "comme le peau des animal..."). Oh, and I'll definitely be in shape and all buff by the end of the summer. I may not post as often because I'm often quite tired, so please forgive me. Email me if you want though, I like emails.

2005-06-01T22:28:00.000-04:00

Omni, this is what the ampersands are all about in the pictures two posts down. A manifesto/petition of sorts was written, mostly by me, about the ampersand for "Rock for the River" a while ago.

Current trends in English and American grammar are slowly leading towards the elimination of one of our language’s more practical yet little known symbols: the ampersand, or “&”. Help us to preserve our linguistic heritage by showing your support for the use of the ampersand. Many brand names and incorporated business names utilize this symbol to simplify the spelling of their names. You too can simplify your life by replacing all instances of “and” with a stylish “&”. Protect the ampersand before it disappears from our language forever!

1) Big business corporations are stealing yet another thing from us, the common people, and we need to stand up for the English language, protect it as it deserves to be and take the ampersand back for ourselves.

2) The ampersand takes many forms, many of them quite ugly. We need to take an aesthetically pleasing version to standardize and keep the English language as beautiful as it could and should be. I think (and, as writer of this manifesto, I think I have the right) that this form should be characterized by that shown in the watermark on this very page. Strange request you say? I hardly think so. All other grammatical symbols in English have become standardized and easily recognizable as being what they are supposed to be. No one writes a period in any other way than as a single dot. The ampersand has been abused far more than any other form of punctuation or symbol. That is why it needs our help to reach its former state of glory and to reclaim its rightful place as king in the realm of symbolical grammar.

We the undersigned agree with all of the above and demand the changes necessary to protect, preserve and in all other ways defend a single awesome version of the ampersand (and to expunge all other forms) so that it once again reaches the grammatical stature and common usage it deserves.

(81 signatures follow including a certain person you may have heard of ... Ghandi. Curiously enough he has the same email as one of my friends.)

2005-05-31T16:51:00.000-04:00

I started my new job today at the rubber factory. I make mudflaps for big trucks. Now I smell like them. Go me.

2005-05-24T17:39:00.000-04:00

I got my pictures back from Ilana's graduation. I found out that I look pretty evil when I wear black. Look at this picture of me and my sister. I'm clearly up to something, something devious. My sister looks like she is about to punch something, probably me. She has her fists clenched and that strained smile for the camera on her face.

Oh wow, look at that picture. What a handsome devil with that windblown hair and that sexy ampersand around his neck.... Narcissistic? Who? Perhaps my sister was jealous of my ampersand.

This picture is one I find hilarious. Look at Ilana, all sweet and beautiful, looking off into middle distance, and then there is my mug doing my best to hold that incredulous / surprised / non-comprehending look while my dad is laughing behind the camera. Oh, and look! Two sexy ampersands.

I guess Etienne found that look pretty funny also. Of course, that could be because of all the illegal drugs he has clearly been smoking when no one was looking. Or maybe he is high on cheese!*

*Etienne wasn't actually high on anything (except, perhaps, life), it just appears that way in this picture.

2005-05-21T00:58:00.000-04:00

I just saw Star Wars Episode III. Awesome movie, it was. They killed off my hero! :'(

I had my first Conversational French lesson today with my new teacher, the robot cook, posts here as Mekashef or MKSF. Believe it or not, he actually knows a lot of French. Some of the more noteable/depressing words I learned today include: gerant, minable, mauvais, mal, echelle and poignet. In return I teach him the basics of guitar. He gets a cookie if he can recognize the progression I gave him to learn by the next lesson.

2005-05-12T00:23:00.000-04:00

Farewell Mailin. You will be missed.

And look at Ilana, studying, a year ago. I bet no one remembers this picture. I sure didn't. It came as quite a surprise to find it on my computer. I think this was one of my first pictures with what was then my new digital camera. Look at all that chalk on the walls.

I found this wonderful picture of my sister. I don't think she'd like it if she found I posted this online, so no one tell her. Ok?

I also found a song about the Kreb's Cycle. It kind of sucks. I shouldn't be surprised. How it got on my computer is what I want to know. Anyone who wants a copy of the song, let me know and I'll email it to you or something. Let you be warned though, it really sucks. Those who seem to get off on really really bad stuff may like it though.

Sam with a beard last summer. He looks sort of angry, but he isn't. Well, maybe a little bit. Those steps are not as comfortable as they look. Oh, and I was working. My partner was being stupid that day too, so I cut him out of the picture. Mwhahaha!

Finally, a pretty sky last summer. I can't wait until it is really summer and not just feeling like summer.

And this has been another (?) edition of late night (early morning?) finding and posting pictures from Sam's computer.

2005-05-11T00:34:00.000-04:00

I just found out that the dentist in my town's name is Dr. Christopher W. Herten-Greaven. I'm absolutely serious. Has anyone actually gone for an appointment with this guy? I know I'm staying as far away from him as possible, at least as far as dentistry is concerned. I told this to my mother and all she had to say was, "At least he isn't an undertaker."

2005-05-05T14:31:00.000-04:00

Hehehe.

2005-05-02T23:56:00.000-04:00

This is a desktop (reduced in size) I made from one of the pictures from when I (and the rest of the band) went to the recording studio in Montreal. I think it is really cool, of course I'm a bit biased because I made it and took the picture to begin with. It has meaning for me, like a good piece of artwork (I'm not comparing this to any great works, don't worry).

I explained it in this way recently to someone via an MSN conversation. She didn't get it. Perhaps my explanation was not clear:

The subject is the only thing in the picture we can definine, yet it is the only thing that is blurry. The swirls of nothing are clearly defined. This seems to suggest that though we can clearly see definition in them, this doesn't convey meaning and that meaning itself is subjective and not dependant on clarity. The fact that the guitarist has no face or fingers accents this point.

Reading it again, I understand it isn't all that clear.

2005-04-28T22:37:00.000-04:00

A picture I took while walking to Lennoxville from Ilana's house last week, actually on the way to the Lion where the picture from last post was taken.

From left to right we have Ilana, smiling evilly with intent (to do what? I'm not sure, but she clearly intends something); Oliver, smiling in a manner which would suggest that he is generally confused as to what is really going on, which is probably the case at this particular moment in time; Mailin just smiling, which, apparantly, she doesn't do all that often in pictures. Wait! Who is that handsome devil on the right? I dare say that it is myself!?! Yes, I took the picture and still managed to get in on the action myself. Wow! What magic is this, that I manage to frame everything perfectly? Well, as it turns out, I have long arms and the ability to hold peoples attention for more than one picture. But look at that smirk/squinty eye combo. I also am clearly up to something. I think that something was actually taking the picture, but let's keep some element of mystery about it and say that we are not sure.

What is that I hear? You want more pictures of Mailin, the one who isn't confused or up to something? Alright, I can do that. But I'll only show pictures of her where she isn't smiling so that order is restored.

Here she is not smiling in the graveyard where we found this really cool cross.

Here she is in the mall where she made me take this picture of her where she wasn't smiling so that order would be restored.

Finally, here is one on the bus. You have no idea how hard it is to get a clear picture on the bus with a bad digital camera.

In case you were wondering, I do take pictures of other people also, but they aren't visiting from Germany at the moment. Don't worry, they will have their time on the soon to be picture ridden pages of The Fangorious Leap.

2005-04-25T00:29:00.000-04:00

This is a picture taken on Thursday night at The Golden Lion Pub. Featured from left to right are Mailyn (she's from Germany :o), Andra, Oliver (the elusive almighty conga man), and a small portion of Ilana's head.

As you can see, this picture is a little odd for several reasons. The first thing you will notice when looking at the picture, which you doubtless already have, is Andra. She is unavoidable, right in the middle, staring right at you, or me (I took this picture, of course), as the case may be. There is something odd about that look; it is almost sultry. Perhaps that is how she gets when she drinks (1?), I don't really know. All I know is that I don't get (or notice) looks like that from many people, as hard as that is to believe, and I am not sure why she would be giving me one at this moment.

There is one option, that it isn't addressed at me, the picture taker, but rather at someone else. You'll notice that she has her arms around both people on either side of her. You'll also notice that one of those people looks mildly frightened or uncomfortable (Mailyn) and the other looks way too happy to be touching someone that isn't his girlfriend (Oliver). Perhaps the look says she has laid claim to these two people and one is afraid and one couldn't be happier. Ilana seems to think this idea is hilarious off to the side.

Enough about that. The other odd thing you will notice is that the pitcher in the middle of the table, at the bottom right of the picture, is empty. What you will find more surprising is the knowledge that it and its predecessors as well as the ones that came after it were in an almost constant state of emptiness. As soon as it was present it was emptied. This is the fault of Oliver, user of the large straw. Perhaps that is the reason he is smiling so much. "Hahaha! The pitcher is always empty! You can get another but it will be empty again! Mwhahahaha!" He must be evil, look at him. He has that evil looking mustache/beard combo and he is wearing sunglasses in a dark bar. He actually looks like he could be blind. Ilana seems to find this idea hilarious also.

Of course, I know the real reason why people are looking the way they are for the simple reason that I was there taking the picture at the time. The truth is that I made a joke. Probably not a very good joke. In fact, I think it is safe to say that it was a bad joke. Andra is looking at me as if to say, "I know you think that is funny, but what makes you think we would? I guess I'll smirk and look at you evilly because you are holding a camera." Oliver loves it, because he loves bad jokes, and is clearly enjoying the horrible nature of the joke. Mailyn looks scared, as should have been expected, not knowing previously the not so great side of my humour. She still decides to smile for the camera, which is very nice of her. Ilana is giving me an evil eye (yes, only one) while laughing hysterically, possibly having beer come out her nose. I can't really remember, but the picture is suggestive (not at all) of this as a definite possibility. Your thoughts?

2005-04-19T20:09:00.000-04:00

The view from across the road today. It was so nice outside, and I found this view inspiring while I was studying for marketing this afternoon.

2005-04-17T16:31:00.000-04:00

Life, the Universe and Everything

This post will only be in note form because I should really be studying for exams of which I have 4 this coming week and another paper due at the end of that. My first exam is tomorrow morning and I am a bit worried about it but studying for it seems a bit less than productive because it all seems so easy, logical and henously boring. The exam I'm really worried about is on Wednesday evening and is for my Marketing Management class. I am particularly worried because I failed the midterm. So, right now I try to bring myself to study for intermediate microeconomics, listen to Queens of the Stone Age, Radiohead and talk to friends online. I can be a motivated individual under certain circumstances, but studying for business finals seems not to be one of them. I think it is this reason that I will be forever condemned to scholastic mediocrity.

Tim Burton is coming out with a new animated film. This looks like it will be a great film. I have not seen an animated Tim Burton film. Please don't lynch me. The HitchHikers Guide to the Galaxy movie comes out next week and Mkshf and I are going to the premier. I don't know how, or where, but we are going, and it had better be worth it. It seems I forgot about the whole note form thing. Oh well, I guess you get a treat today. Sorry about the lack of posting lately, I have been busy and will likely continue to be for at least the coming week. 2 more things. 1) Mai Lyn is coming from Germany tomorrow. w00t! 2) I need a summer job, any ideas?

Wish me sanity and good luck.

2005-04-08T10:18:00.000-04:00

A conversation I had yesterday during attendance taking for choir.

Ben: I've never made a fart before.
Me: Really?
B: Well, usually you get kicked out of class, but seriously, who is going to kick me out of choir?
Me: True.
Ben: 'Alright Ben, here's a dunce cap, get on the front of the stage!'

Disruptive laughter and scenario building ensued.

Finally, someone else who finds the dunce cap idea hilarious and uses it themselves. Ben is generally a funny guy, but I've not hung out with him at all outside choir, nor in all probability will I as we run in very different crowds.

Anyways, one 30-page paper down, one to go. Choir show for tonight and Saturday are sold out. Buy your tickets for Sunday as soon as possible.

2005-04-05T23:44:00.000-04:00

I'm only updating so that people will stop harassing me to do so. I can stay unresponsive if I please! I have been quite busy, with tonnes of work to do and only a week left of school. I won 3% on my final grade by winning a presentation contest for Marketing Management class. I was very happy about that. I can't snap my fingers when I sing, at least not with the music, and at least not with River of Dreams, the song where I am supposed to for this Friday, Saturday and Sunday's choir show. Luckily I no longer have to. Come to the choir show, buy your tickets in advance if you can. I am svelt and am compared to the norse god of war Tyr by some. Interesting. I am tired. I am going to bed. Goodnight all. Sorry for the lack of posts recently.

2005-03-30T22:42:00.000-05:00

Which Colossal Death Robot Are You?
Brought to you by Rum and Monkey

2005-03-23T21:45:00.000-05:00

An interesting conversation I had this afternoon that I thought was document worthy. Now that it has been documented, it seems a bit lacking. Perhaps I forgot some vital bits, but I'm pretty sure it is pretty accurate. No offence was meant, I was clearly joking about the babies.

Me: …Something, something… third wheel.

Mystery Person: I think the expression was originally ‘fifth wheel’.

Me: Fifth wheel? Are you sure? Third wheel sounds much better.

Mystery Person: Yeah, but a fifth wheel is completely useless.

Me: So is a third wheel.

Mystery Person: What about on a tricycle?

Me: Tricycle’s are stupid. Babies use them.

Mystery Person: So, everything babies use are stupid?

Me: Naturally. Babies are stupid.

Mystery Person: Hahaha!

Me: Pretty much everything they do is stupid.

Mystery Person: You're stupid. Eww! Babies do you!

Me: That’s disgusting!

Mystery Person: You’re disgusting.

Me: I wish.

*Maniacal laugher ensues*

Fabulous prizes to the person who guesses the mystery person. The mystery person cannot win. Other restrictions may apply.

2005-03-18T13:26:00.000-05:00

I went to a Planet Smashers/Guttermouth/Ghosts of Modern Man concert last night with Ilana and Dr. Awesome. It was really good, especially Ghosts of Modern Man. They had this crazy bassist with dreads similar to Samuel L. Jackson in Caveman's Valentine and at one point during the last song he picked up a beer bottle and started playing his bass with it for a while. It was uber cool. Dr. Awesome bought one of their CD's. The Planet Smashers were pretty good too. They have some really good songs that are way better live, my favorite being Life of the Party. At one point during the last encore, the trumbonist tripped and fell over backwards over the guitarist and lead singers patch cord while he was running backwards across the stage. After playing for 30 seconds more in a confused way, the singer gets everyone to stop, says a few words about why you should loop the cord around the strap (so you can trip anyone of course), puts his guitar back on, and counts in the end of the song. Was an awesome show! Oh yeah!

2005-03-15T08:07:00.000-05:00

Hello internet. I am still alive after nearly a week of non-posting. I have something worthy of posting now though, actually several but I'll limit myself to one this morning. I have found the illusive weakness of the superbeing that we have come to know as Ilandra (the presence of both Ilana and Andra creates the presence of another being entirely). Don't beleive me? It is not one of the usual weaknesses like the absence of a fully functional left arm or something, but something that I have yet to find in any other superbeings of any kind; that is, navigation. Let me explain.

On Sunday morning, Ilana, Andra and I went to the music store to get Andra a guitar, me a tuner and Ilana some strings. I won't bore you with the details of the selection process, suffice to say that she now has a new guitar and it sounds pretty decent (even if it is a smoker). So, after all business had been conducted, we found it necessary to leave the store so we could return home instead of claiming the boni-soir next door as our new one as had been suggested. I was in the back seat and Ilana had said that she knew how to get home, so I contented myself to daydreaming of recording popular songs on my computer using just my voice and becoming very famous based on the fact of how bad and hilarious they would be. It was an interesting daydream and when I emerged from it many minutes later we were back at the music store. No, we hadn't intended to go back there, we just sort of ended up there. I thought to myself, "Alright, they have eliminated the wrong way. They will surely get us home this time." So, once again, I lapsed into the waking dream world and probably dreamt of some evil force trying to take over the world and the superbeing sitting in front of me saving the world, but I can't really remember, so I could be wrong.

When I emerge for a second time, I found myself on a lonely stretch of highway and no one seemed to know if we were going in the right direction. As it turns out, we weren't. To cut a long story short, we did eventually arrive home about an hour later completely intact with the only casualty being the perfect reputation of Ilandra. I don't hold it against you, not even a little bit. I had some good daydreams and then a vegitarian meal at Ilana's house (which was very good, as usual). Sorry about the bottle, Ilana's Mom.

2005-03-09T22:42:00.000-05:00

I had a little discussion about intelectual property today after class with my favorite professor after he was talking about the business ethics of stealing information and then pyrating software. We talked of cultural influences, mostly the Chinese, and I mentioned Adam's theory of why there should be no intelectual property (We are all made in G-d's own image, so any thought we have should belong to him; to claim ownership of any of these would be tantamount to theft/plaigerism/sin). I asked him if that argument would hold up in court at which he simply laughed and said he wasn't entirely sure. What do you think of the argument in general and of its possible legal implications? What do you think of the subject in a society where we are utterly dependant on it?

2005-03-06T00:06:00.000-05:00

I forgot to mention that in one of the recordings that we made on Tuesday of a certain song in which I have some vocal input was great, except for the fact that I only sang on key about half of the time. This is perhaps due to the fact that I was making most of it up as the song went, and that I was experimenting with some falsetto sounding notes that aren't really. I think my voice sounded alright, or at least it would have had I hit notes that were not awkward to the point of wincing, much as you would if you were to watch someone fall from 10 feet off the ground and land on the branch of a fairly large tree with his genetalia making first contact. The point is that I sound awful and if anyone hears the recording, I feel I must apologize and assure you that I can actually sing decently when I know what I'm doing.

Another thing I learned this weekend include the fact that I find Ilana's Mom mildly frightening, possibly due to a minor phobia of smaller than average things. There can be several possible reasons for this potential phobia (it hasn't actually been proven to exist within my littered neurons yet), none of which I will get into at the moment. Also, Chris B. (known as a commenter on this blog who goes by Chris 75 000) shall now be known as Dr. Awesome (Oooooh, Yeaaah!) and Chris M. will be known as Stumpy* to avoid confusion in the band.

*It must be noted here that Chris M. had himself chosen this name over the other sugested nickname of surly, which, he claims, is already reserved for the commenter known as Senor Soupe. I had always thought that it was merely a descriptive or a family trait, but apparantly I'm wrong on that one.

2005-03-05T21:05:00.000-05:00

Just got back from the recording studio in Montreal. It was a fun weekend and we got one song done and recorded properly. We went up on Friday evening and decided to get started early on it. We recorded the drum track (which eventually had to be redone because it was wrong), the bass track (mine, this one only took about 20 minutes and 2 takes) some of the guitar tracks (there ended up being 3 or 4 in the end) and Mekashef's 2 voice parts that night before going to bed. This morning we laid down the rest of the guitar, the violin (for which there was much trouble and agonizing over but eventually turned out pretty good, I think) and the second voice. A piano bit was debated but discarded because it interfered with the second violin bit. I can't wait to hear the final mixed and mastered version.

I am a bit sick with some form of mutant cold/cough/infection that either Ilana or Oliver or both gave to me. It is making my hearing sound muffled. For the first two days I was smelling vomit all the time even though there was clearly none around to be whiffed. Consequently, I didn't sleep well, and had locked myself off in a separate room so as to protect the others from the potential contagion and the unavoidable noise with which I was bound to cause. Meds helped. A lot.

A new technique of playing the theramine was concieved of but will not mentioned in this blog because as Ilana's Mom so kindly put it, "I thought this was a family blog!"

2005-03-02T16:05:00.000-05:00

I'm going on the radio tonight along with Chris on his program Bazooka Radio which airs at 8:00 tonight. Tune in here or on 88.9 FM if you are in the area. Off to the schvitz. Stay classy, internet.

2005-03-01T23:42:00.000-05:00

I went to a Moroccan resaurant today called La Baladi with Kevin and Mekashef. It was very cool. You get a massive and overflowing plate full of food such as lamb, chicken, salad, humus, rice and gus-gus with a tea and soup for only $7.88 CAD. At the table next to us were a bunch of government types that Mekashef said he knew from his party days.

This evening we were recorded again in the practice room and the results were much better than on Sunday, mostly because my fingers hadn't died on me this time around and because we had a bass. I can't wait to hear the recordings. On Friday evening to Saturday we are going to a real recording studio to do some pro recording. I am very anxious.

2005-02-25T15:04:00.000-05:00

I don't know about you, but I love The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. I find it utterly hilarious and when I watch it, people tend to think I'm going to die from laughter because my face gets all red and I start rolling around as if I were choking, which I may very well be if I happen to be eating when the show comes on, but usually it is just from laughter. The point is that I just found an excellent clip from it online that I think people would generally enjoy about the fairly recent art exhibition in Central park. Go here and then click on Piles of Sheet. I hope it works for any mac users out there. Enjoy.

2005-02-25T13:07:00.000-05:00

I decided I would finally post about the Death Murder Burger much like Chris and unlike Ilana.

The Death Murder Burger Epic v2.0
“Hello. I’d like a death murder burger with fries and a milkshake please.”
“Uhhh … quoi?”
“A death … murder … burger.”
“Un moment s’il vous plait.”

Perhaps I should explain. The Death Murder Burger was conceived of by Chris Brandon as a way to eat 4 animals at once. He had been influenced by the idea of the Turducken (chicken stuffed inside a duck stuffed inside a turkey with a vest of ribs and a bacon bow-tie) and one of the special features of School of Rock with Jack Black. What is a Death Murder Burger composed of that it be given such a name you may ask? It is a Quarter-pounder paddy with cheese and bacon on top of a McChicken paddy on top of a Filet-o-Fish paddy all on one bun. The reason for the name is or should be obvious if you have seen Super-size me. The simple truth of the matter is that if anyone ate only this sandwich for more than 2 consecutive meals in a row, instant death would surely be the result whether it be from a clogged artery, the collective shut-down of most of the organs you will probably be wanting if you wish to stay alive or the shutdown of the brain because it can’t believe how unbelievably stupid its host is and feels the sudden urge to kill it and end what surely must be a burden on the rest of the population.

Given the nature of the burger, why then did we decide to go through with it? The answer to that one is quite a simple one. We are young and foolish. We are also quite healthy individuals and feel our bodies can sustain a bit of torment for the illustrious cause of eating 4 animals at the same time. There were also ethical concerns by some (Ahem … Etienne) that were completely unfounded in mine and the other’s minds as we saw the situation and its potential impaction on ourselves, others and the world in general.

Anyways, so what actually happened? It all started on a Monday afternoon/evening around 6:00 when we (Etienne, conscientious objector; Ilana, semi-vegetarian; Oliver, adamant meat eater; Josephine, horror and excitement seeker; and I, prominent advocator of the finer cuts of meat) had decided to meet Chris at the local McDonalds. We were quite hungry at this point having not eaten since lunch or some such, so I decided to head right for the counter.

“Hello. I’d like a death murder burger with fries and a milkshake please.”
“Uhhh … quoi?”
“A death … murder … burger.”
“Comment … uh … C’est quoi ca?”
“It is a [insert ingredients listed above] on one bun. Will you make it for me or should I do the assembly myself?”
“Un moment s’il vous plait.”

The conversation that followed between the boss of the serveuse with whom I had just spoken was the first proof of many to come that we were in fact at the worst MacDonalds in the history of the evil yet successful conglomerate. First she asked the boss if it could be made, so seemed confused so I explained it to her also but before I could get an answer my serveuse started arguing about who should serve me, a major taboo in any service related business, based mostly on the fact that I was one of those Anglophone usurpers and she didn’t have the intimate grasp on the language that is required to understand an order for a few burgers. I thought we were understanding each other as well as possible under the circumstances but I am clearly inferior in this province of enlightened francophones and my opinion is clearly not worth the words they are formulated with.

After at least 3 minutes of banter the boss finally got fed up and raised her voice saying, “No, you serve him and [to me] no you can’t do that.” This was fine with me, so I just ordered the components along with some fries and a milkshake and waited what seemed like at least 20 minutes but was probably more like 15 to get my burgers, seeing Oliver and Josephine order after me and get their food first (I think this is because they ordered in French). When I finally did get my food, I checked and there was no bacon on it! How was I supposed to eat four animals at the same time if there are only 3 animals present to be eaten? Riddle me this! I think this was some sort of joke on us by the staff because they didn’t give any of us our bacon. Chris even had to mud-wrestle to get the coke he had ordered, which was entertaining at the very least.

Finally, we all set down at our tables and started the assembly, peeling off paddies and assembling them onto one bun. I used that of the quarter pounder, or royale with cheese as Pulp Fiction has taught me they are called in France, to avoid the tartar sauce of the Filet-o-Fish. As you can see from the above pictures that it was a bit messy, and as can be seen below, ultimately a very large burger which we all enjoyed eating.

I with my upheld pinky, trying to bring a bit of class to the event. You can see just how big it was by the fact that all our neck muscles are straining to open our mouths that big.

Chris, eyes closed, is clearly savouring the moment as best he can. Or perhaps he is trying to forget that he is a vegetarian so that he can just enjoy his burger.

Ilana wasn’t forced to eat it despite. What this picture seems to suggest. She liked it.

Josephine didn’t like it but she seems to be laughing in this picture.

Oliver, so small and as dainty and ethereal a drummer as can be found, even in Europe is enjoying a chomp down on this mammoth culinary abomination.

Speaking of abomination, as I have mentioned, some people didn’t approve of the venture. In fact I had protestors outside my house the night before, picketing with humorous signs reading, “Make love not bacon!” and “Chutney not Gluttony!” to which I retaliated by blasting the Arrogant Worms song Carrot Juice Is Murder at them until they decided it was a good idea to leave me alone, which took only an astonishing 10 minutes. I think it was my singing along off key that did it. I also threatened to invite Tom over to join me.

So, anyways, we enjoyed our burgers and as taught from a young age, ate all the leftovers buns so as to have no waste. Oliver decided he hadn’t broken enough gastronomic rules for the night and filled his bun with French fries saying it tasted great. I guess the burgers did something good for us because we then had a band practice and wrote a pretty cool song that was more sophisticated that usual. Hurrah for the Death Murder Burger! Here, here and here are some more pictures for you to enjoy and create captions for in the comments.

2005-02-21T10:46:00.000-05:00

I had a fantastic weekend! Started it all off with a mini party at Ian's place with Ilana, Ryan, Jen, Ian (of course), Tom (or Matt, I can't recall) and I. Ian creeped me out by first nibbling on my foot, then sock, then turning into a dog (crazy actors) and trying to get attention from everyone. He needs a girlfriend.

Saturday we played our show, which went alright, I guess. It was very much fun anyways. After it, we all went to Ryan's for one of his barbeques (this time his barbeque actually worked). There were tonnes of people at this one and much fun was had. As the evening evolved, Improv games started to be played. We played Freeze and then Should Have Said-Freeze. It was a great time. The improv games ended when during a 3-stooges sketch Ian and my heads got knocked together very hard and very painfully. Then Tom had a very dramatic exit that left Ian in a very philosophical mood, at which point I left.

There's more, but I have to go to school.

Tonight will be the eating of the Death Murder Burger! Updates may occur

2005-02-17T18:39:00.000-05:00

I am worth $1,867,450.00 on HumanForSale.com

How horrid is it that they can place a monetary value on a person based on eye colour and sense of style.

2005-02-16T09:07:00.000-05:00

A special treat for all of you today from the dream world of Sam. It is a poem that came to me in a dream. Well, not so much a poem as a song and not so much an original song as changed lyrics to another previously existing song. Anyways, here it is:

What if God was one of us
An Episcopalian like one of us
Transubstantiating one of us
Into a femur or Mucous

Thats as far as I got, or at least as much as I recall. Anyone else have song dreams last night?

2005-02-13T20:30:00.000-05:00

Whoa! When did I get over a thousand hits? Why are people coming to this site at all?

2005-02-13T19:45:00.000-05:00

I had an amazing time last night. I went dancing (first time) at Cafe Du Palais with Jen, Josephine, Ilana, Dave, Dave, The Almighty Conga Man and Kevin. Dancing is uber fun. I suck at it, but it is fun. They played alternative and a good variety of music, which I enjoyed quite a bit. The Almighty Conga Man and Josephine hooked up during the last song before they kicked us out (as this blog becomes the new repository for all the latest gossip). After we all went back to the apartment and I slept on the very hard and uncomfortable (to me at least) floor. I didn't sleep well. Oh well, what can you do. Then this morning we all went for brunch, and ate tonnes. It was really good food (they had sushi!) but it was a bit more expensive than I would have liked. For a good meal with good friends it was well worth it. I saw my first Woody Allen flick after, but I missed the middle-end because I fell asleep. Not because it wasn't interesting, or that I wasn't enjoying it, but just because I hadn't really slept at all and was really tired. I'm not tired anymore. In fact I'm feeling quite the opposite of tired. Anyways, band practice was alright, but I had to leave early to work on a presentation that we hadn't started for tomorrow, which got finished and I think is quite good.

This mental flush brought to you by the man who is not tired but really thinks he should be, Sam. Apologies to readers expecting, and probably rightly so, better.

2005-02-12T14:10:00.000-05:00

The Dante's Inferno Test has sent you to Purgatory!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Level	Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)	Very High
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)	Low
Level 2 (Lustful)	Moderate
Level 3 (Gluttonous)	Low
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)	Moderate
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)	Low
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)	Very Low
Level 7 (Violent)	Low
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)	High
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)	Very Low

Take the Dante's Inferno Hell Test

2005-02-12T10:44:00.000-05:00

Now that the previous post of self praise has worn off at least in a minor way, I will again post something that could be perceived as meaningful, most likely if you are not as perceptive as the average falling anvil. I just wanted to include something about a falling anvil. Forgiven? No? Bollocks.

I'm listening to a CD of Raggmopp called Please Reproduce This Album In Any Form that Chris lent to me. They are really cool, very different like everything he listens to. The CD cover consists of a crudely drawn person who I think looks like your typical computer software engineer (that is nothing extraordinarily special) replete with square plastic glasses and pens sticking out of his breast pocket on the plastic of the jewel case. This otherwise ordinary man is quite distinctively not so for 2 things that I neglected to mention in my description. That is in his left hand (not mine) he holds a bloodied axe and has a red spattered person. In the background there is a large sack with a head, arm and a leg protruding from the opening in the top sitting in a pool of what I can only assume was intended to be blood. The music isn't what you'd think of when you see this however. The song I listen to now has the lyrics consisting as far as I can tell of this, "Donkey, donkey, donkey, donkey" (which is hardly surprising considering that is the title of the song) with the music just playing some scalular riffs. Interesting indeed. Thanks again to Chris for the lend.

Chris also lent me The Salmon of Doubt by my favourite author of all time and space Douglas Adams. This fact probably explains the previous paragraph.

2005-02-09T09:43:00.000-05:00

Remember that test I couldn't bring myself to study for? Well, I never really did study for it. I got it back yesterday and it appears that I needn't feel guilty in the least as I got 89% on it where the class average was 75%. Apparently we are the smartest class in Finance 1 in the history of the school so far. Go us. On another note, I heard back from the Mitre and they are going to publish one of my stories. Yay. We came up with a very catchy tune on Monday that is making fun of this ad campaign. It has been stuck in my head for days. If you come to our show on the 17th, perhaps you'll hear it.

2005-02-06T13:52:00.000-05:00

Friday was fun. I went to La Resto Mexican with Chris, The Almighty Conga Man, Mekashef, Mike, Emily, Josephine and Ilana. The food was great, and I talked to a mexican friend of mine named Esteban and he says that it is really quite authentic. Yesterday I went to Ilana's Mom's concert and enjoyed myself. I really liked the piece called The Notebook of Love Songs and I'm not just saying that because it was composed by Ilana's Dad. I loved his gratuitous use of harmonics. So much emotion in it; it was wonderful.

Today I was regailed with stories from an old man's army days. They were great! Almost makes me want to join the army. Almost. He told me stories of all the times he had accidentaly lit his pants on fire, and burned holes through his shirt, and then of his first shore leave... Anyways, gotta love an old man wearing a fedora with a rememberance day poppy still in it smoking a pipe and telling you interesting and funny stories of days gone by.

I like Sundays. Today is special. You can ask me any question in the comments and I will reply in 5 words with 100% honesty. This offer expires at 5:45 this evening. Good day.

2005-02-02T22:33:00.000-05:00

Happy Birthday Mekashef!!!

Sometimes I hate the poeple in my program. Some guy in my class today was laughing maniacally at me for fully 5 minutes about some chance of a number I chose. I can't understand this type of behaviour. I mean, it isn't as if this guy has anything going for him. He is excessively fat, ugly and seemingly borders on the mentally deficient. It isn't that I was or am bothered by this, it is just that I think he is a moron and that his parents should have never been allowed to procreate. And then other times I really like the people. There are a lot of genuinely nice/interesting people in my program. Unfortunately people like the one mentioned above tend to demean the whole.

I had a nice chat with one of my professors today who I had in my first year. Out of the blue just pops up and decides it is a good time for a chat. I like that. He remembered from the spring that I owned a film company (I didn't bother to tell him that I had resigned last week) even though he was copiously drunk at the entrepreneurship seminar we were at when he found out. Anyways, nice to have profs like that.

I should really be studying for a Finance 1 midterm I have tomorrow, but I can't bring myself to care/worry about it even though it is worth 30% of my grade and it is supposed to be one of the toughest courses in the program. To worry would mean that I would study, and to study would mean that I would possibly do quite well on the exam. I have now no such guarantee, but somehow that doesn't bother me ... yet.

2005-02-02T01:03:00.000-05:00

Happy Birthday Mekashef!!!

2005-01-31T10:58:00.000-05:00

w00t! this week is going to be a good one, equal if not greater to the last. Last week there were those awesome plays, productive band practices and that uber fun business simulation. I didn't think the simulation would be, but it ended up being like having a nice sized lan party playing something like Civ 3 without the graphics and with business instead of war. Anyways, this week we've got another couple of band practice that promise to be quite good, a trip to the schvitz after one and to a Mexican restaurant with a party of 10 after the other. Thats what I really anticipate the most. I finished reading Angels and Demons by Dan Brown and it is really quite good. I found it a bit predictable and mildly drawn out near the end, but I'd recomend it to anyone if the asked me for some recomendations, though even so it wouldn't be at the top of the list.

I've got a meeting with my favorite professor this afternoon and a small test this morning. Wish me luck.

2005-01-24T23:57:00.000-05:00

E: What are you up to tonight?
Me: I'm going to band practice in about an hour.
E: Oh? A band? What instrument do you play?
Me: Guitar, Bass and occasionally I sing.
E: You play guitar? Then you must know Steve! He plays guitar and is in the Music program.
Me: This may come as a bit of a shock to you, but not all guitarists share a telepathic link with each other. As such, I don't know him, nor do I know of him.
E: *doesn't get it and continues talking about something else for about 30 seconds when she said:* Hey! I know that not all guitarists share a telepathic link! My brother plays guitar and you don't know him!
Me: Probably not. *I didn't bother to inquire whether that was in fact true*

I love the schvitz, but I think I may have over done it this time. I was light headed (even more than usual) for about 20 minutes after I got out, at times needing the support of the wall to stay upright. And my skin was tingly after too. Will I stop going? Never!

2005-01-23T23:01:00.000-05:00

I played hockey today with the boysin lieu of doing any actual work. It was very much fun and I have the bruises to prove it. Apologies to those I injured. Chris, I hope your kidneys are feeling better and working at better than 43% capacity after that body check. In my defence, you did have the puck. It was the first time I have skated all year so my feet nearly fell off after the first half, after which I switched to the infinitely more comfortable and equally less frictitious shoes. It was uber fun.

I also finished Stardust by Neil Gaiman. I quite enjoyed it. It has been compared to The Princess Bride (I, admitedly, only saw the movie), which I also enjoyed (the movie that is). If I can find any of his other books such as Neverwhere or American Gods, I will gladly read them.

One last thing. Happy Birthday Ilana's Mom!

2005-01-21T13:51:00.000-05:00

Last night I watched a Bruce Lee movie. I'd never seen a Bruce Lee movie before. I love Bruce Lee. I think I'm just going to keep saying Bruce Lee. Bruce Lee Bruce Lee Bruce Lee! I'm done.

It is uber cold outside. This time I mean it. It is mustache-frozen-after-20-feet
with-big-chunks-of-ice-in-it weather. Legs-numb-halfway-to-town weather. Didn't-even-notice-the-creepy-graveyard-full-of-now-frozen-zombies weather. In short, it is really, really cold out side. Last night while walking home, which I realize I didn't have to do, I had to make a stop at Esso to thaw out for a bit. It didn't even take me that long, the walk, I mean; only about 45 minutes including thaw break. I didn't even freeze my lungs as some were worried would happen because of my habit of running whenever the slope is downward. I like that habit. It is a good one.

I have many worse habits, like making fun of vegitarians and the French. Sorry, to all those offended. Especially Mekashef as he is both. Speaking of Mekashef, he lend me a really cool book called Stardust by Neil Gaiman which I'm really enjoying. Hmm, that sounds like a good idea right now.

2005-01-19T10:53:00.000-05:00

I submitted 2 things to the Miter (?), a Bishop's publication that I've never read, but apparently has some good writtings and pictures in it. My submissions are a little silly and I'll know they are really desperate for material if they both get in. Updates on this story and others will be posted as they become available. This is Sam, live at my computer, on wednesday saying, wish me good luck because it will be a long day.

2005-01-17T01:07:00.000-05:00

1) My school had a fundraiser for the tsunami relief fund by watching a surfing movie and going to the bar. Anyone else find this a little odd?

2) I watched Harold and Kumar go to Whitecastle twice today and I found it funny both times.

3) The Bulgarian national anthem (or at least the version I know) is hilarious and awesome to sing.

4) I have been having trouble remembering conversations lately. Now think I may be mixing up the dream world with the real one (since I have started remembering at least some of my dreams). The most recent incident (it isn't really an incident) involves me not recalling whether it was conversation or dream when several very good and persuasive arguments were made to the effect that the French (as in those from France) should be made fun of forever. I don't recall the reasons either, except for the fact that they were very good ones. I think this shows all the signs of being a dream personally.

5) Band practice was very productive today. We wrote 2 new songs. I play bass for both of them! Hurrah! I love playing bass. I like it more than guitar. Uh oh, secret's out.

Let the debating begin.

2005-01-13T22:53:00.000-05:00

My first photoshop creation. I can now draw at least one thing that isn't a stick man, but not with my own hands and not in under an hour.

2005-01-13T18:55:00.000-05:00

This semester as I can see it now is going to be a good one. I have no teacher that I don't like so far as I can presently tell. They all seem quite interesting and competent, which is quite a bit more than I can say for some of my teachers of last semester. The courses I'm taking seem to have good material and will more than likely teach me a lot of useful things.

I know some of you readers dislike business in all its forms, or at least claim to. I think that you fail to realize that organizations such as Red Cross are also businesses. Many busineses do great things for society in general. I won't get all preachy, but business isn't all bad, or even mostly bad as a lot of you would tend to think. Of course there are a lot of examples of bad businesses, but there are many times as many of good ones that we don't hear about. I being an optomist of a rather high order prefer to concentrate on the good ones.

In regards to the bot that is posting advertising in my and others' comments, stop it! You are giving yourself a bad name and I hate you and the website/company you represent! Refer to Mekashef's blog for a possibly better and certainly longer post about this.

2005-01-10T22:02:00.000-05:00

The funniest thing happened after practice today. Mekashef and I were standing outside, just minding out own business, talking about pagodas etc. when Miguel opens the back door to Bandeen, stands next to the railing and looks off into middle distance away from us towards what appeared to be some buildings. After about thirty seconds of this, without so much as a movement, Mekashef spoke up.

"Are you looking for someone or something?"

"...My car ... I can't remember where I parked it..." his voice trails off.

After a pause, "Well, I hope you find it."

Almost imediately this was said after Miguel abrubtly turns around and disappears inside. I burst out laughing at the absurdity of this guy and his peculiar actions. Mekashef says something about all that music going to his head. I had barely stopped giggling like a pre-pubescent monkey when he bursts (for that is really the only word for it) the doors and exclaims on the way down the stairs that he has remembered. He seems genuinely proud of himself. What an odd character. Great guitarist though.

2005-01-06T19:40:00.000-05:00

Take my Quiz on QuizYourFriends.com!

2005-01-06T13:24:00.000-05:00

The band's website is being redesigned and if you thought it was complicated before, prepare yourself. My job will be to write a bunch of short stories about random things that will pop up when certain links are clicked. I realize that this is usually how you access things on a website, but you'll see what I mean when you see the new design.

Last night I participated in a movie night with the boys. We watched the Dave Chapelle Killing Them Softly DVD I got for christmas, which is one of the funniest things I have ever seen, and Resident Evil Apocalypse which was less so. In fact it wasn't funny at all, nor was it made to be. Lots of zombies etc. Then, and also before, probably during as well come to think about it, D & D was discussed. Inevitable when Ian and The Almighty Conga Man get together. The Almighty Conga Man is an encyclopaedia when it comes to D & D. He knows everything and exactly in which book it can be found and the very page it is on. It is insane. There was much talk of prestige classes and Geshtalt characters and many other things I know nothing about, but it was still rather interesting to listen to.

Tomorrow, that is Friday for the disoriented, there will be a potluck Barbeque at Ryan's new appartment. I invite most of you to come, email me and I'll let you know if you are among the lucky. He said I could invite anyone, so I am. I don't even know who reads this blog, so I may be surprised at the barbeque. Starts at 4. I'm bringing steaks. Yummy, yummy steaks.

2005-01-03T13:01:00.000-05:00

Has anyone heard what Jeb Bush got our Prime Minister, Paul Martin, for Christmas? A DVD player. Although, technically since the gift is valued at over $200, it is actually Canada's new DVD player. I guess thats nice of him anyways. What was going through his mind though? Did he think Martin didn't have one already or did he just think that his was better? I'm confused. It isn't as if Florida produces DVD players is it? It just strikes me as an odd gift. I wonder what Martin got Bush. A bar of soap and a toothbrush would have been funny, but I don't think so.