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Thursday, April 29, 2004

I won three lollipops, hurrah! I bet a friend that Toronto would get further than would Montreal in the playoffs (NHL hockey for the uninitiated). I bet three lollipops because a) they're more fun than money, b) I get to eat my winnings and c) it means the bet isn't serious (I am rarely completely serious and lollipops seemed like a completely farcical thing to bet). I chose a red, orange and a green one, but she said she didn't have green. I was mildly disappointed, but then I remembered that it was just a lollipop and that it really doesn't matter a pair of fetid dingo's kidneys what colour it is. To make a long story (not really, it pretty much dies out after that point, actually I'm not sure this can even be considered a story at all) short, I am getting a multi-coloured one instead of the [non-existent] green one.

I think San Jose is going to win the cup, but honestly I couldn't care less. The only reason I was paying any attention at all to the sport was for the lollipops and to watch Don Cherry rant and get many people angry over nothing. I don't get some peoples infatuation with the sport, though if I do sit down and watch it (only happens during the playoffs if at all), I am entertained, if only mildly, for the duration of the game/period/cookie. Any hockey fans out there? Why?

Summary in seven words: I'm up three lollipops, hurrah for me.

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I have been playing this game all day as it is copiously (or at least it should be) addicting. I am very happy because we have a band practice today (haven't for about 2 weeks and I was getting the itch to play with other people again). Sorry that the posts are becoming shorter and less interesting every day, but they will return when I have something to write about, like when I get a job or start on my movie.

Summary in seven words: What? That's it? That's all you've got?

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Wednesday, April 28, 2004

Glad I am not American. My countries secret service consists of three guys sitting in a locked closet with one telephone, a 13 inch TV playing Red Green reruns and a telescope. They won't be searching through my weblog for valuable information as will the "people in black trench coats" of the US government.

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I played a gangster in a movie today. No speaking lines, which quite suits me, and only for about 10 seconds, but it was still cool. I was one of the hit-men for "the family" and in my ten seconds of glory, I managed to shoot a man twice and walk about 5 steps. A lot less has been accomplished in ten seconds, and mine were done with finesse and calculation (or whatever). It was just for fun. One of those short notice things (by that I mean a call in the middle of dinner saying put on the suit (first an inquiry as to whether I had one) and be here 10 minutes ago) where the friend directing the movie forgets to tell people when and if they are to be there in advance. It was fun. I would do it again. After a day of golf and taking pictures, this was a good way to finish out the evening.

Summary in seven words: Great exaggerations of my role and performance.

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Monday, April 26, 2004

Talking to Americans was on again today and wow, it is just as funny as ever. For the uninitiated, Talking to Americans is/was a special on TV where a guy (Rick Mercer) goes to various cities and campus' around the United States and 1) tells them obscure stories and asks their comments on them, 2) gets people to sign petitions, or 3) congratulate Canada for doing something. An example of each: 1) Whether Canada should get a Navy since they have no access to ocean, 2) Had a petition trying to stop Canada from starting up the Saskatchewan seal hunt again, 3) congratulations Canada for getting a 24 hour clock (legalizing staplers, VCRs and house pets are some other notables). If you want to hear more, ask me or most other aware Canadians. For some reason, I don't think they play it on American stations. Do Americans find this type of thing insulting, funny, or otherwise I wonder? Let me know in the comments.

Summary in seven words: Talking to Americans is quite ridiculously funny.

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I was going to post some pictures that I have taken, but then I realized that they might/certainly will be incriminating to those involved, so I changed my mind and you get no pictures or tales of incriminating events for the same reason. It really is a shame since they are uber nice pictures. I guess you'll have to seduce me to see them. Mwhahahahaha!!

On another note, I am wearing the best hat on the planet at the moment. Normally I am not a hat person, but this one is truly great. The closest picture I have come across of it after an extensive *ahem google search is this one here, but mine is felt and the top is not crumpled, dented or otherwise. In any case, it is uber cool and you all should be jealous because you don't have one, unless of course you do.

Summary in seven words: No pictures for you. Uber cool hat.

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Saturday, April 24, 2004

I have just returned from another show, this being the second I have been to in a month, not bad for a guy in a small town, hundreds of miles from anything approaching the size of a city. The last show I went to was of a small band from my school that was simply amazing. They were/are called The Stairway Movement. Very Dispatch-esque type of style, mixing folk with jazz, reggae, rock, and probably other things too (I am horrible at giving types to music, all I know is if I like it or not). That was, without doubt, the best show I have ever been to. Very, very danceable style (this coming from a guy who has danced maybe 3 times before), so much so that I did so the whole night. My friend has set up a tribute site to them, but I can't remember how to link, and if I did, I don't know the URL but no doubt he will post it in the comments when he reads this *wink.

This other show that I went to was of The Kry, but don't you hate it when the warm-up bands are better than the feature? The second warm-up band rocked and rocked hard. They were called Smithfield from Orange County, California and they made the night worth it. The Kry translated all their songs into French and most of the songs were sung that way, sometimes switching back to English, but not often. Luckily I can understand French, but I would still have liked to hear them in the original language. It was a bilingual night and that is always awkward (and funny if you know both languages so you can hear how crappy the translation is).

My last exams went well, with a story showing incompetence to come, perhaps. That's all for now.

Summary in seven words: Stairway Movement. Rocked. The Kry. Pass. Smithfield!!

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Tuesday, April 20, 2004

Sorry for the lack of posts guys and gals I promise that they will resume shortly. I have just two exams remaining, those which I consider to be the easiest: microeconomics and statistical analysis. My exams this far have gone well, surprisingly since I thought I was way under-prepared for the last two, with the exception of accounting of course. I am very happy for two main reasons: Toronto won with Domi (my favorite player since he was with Winnipeg) got third star and my new digital camera came in today. I will post some pictures if I can figure out how, or if it is even possible (if anyone knows how, please let me know as I have not the slightest clue). Regular posting will resume starting Saturday ... probably.

Summary in seven words: Sam will return shortly with pictures ... perhaps.

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Thursday, April 15, 2004

The strangest thing happened today and I challenge anyone to top it for sheer, unabashed oddity. I mean, strange stuff has happened to me on a fairly regular basis as I'm sure it has for you, but this is a whole new level that makes me wonder things, strange things, very strange things ... *Ahem, so it went something like this: It was a nice sunny day out, few clouds, temperature hovering around ten, chilling wind. Alright, it was an average spring day. I went outside to switch propane tanks on the barbecue since the one currently attached to it was empty (I am not sure if this is how it is done where you are from, but when something is empty we fill it, or replace with something that has previously been filled around my place; either that or complain about it and do nothing, but on this particular day someone (me) elected to do something about it). So I successfully change tanks, no mishaps, injuries, strange things falling from the sky, mysterious messages, or anything of the sort because we haven't reached the strange part of the story yet. The strange part happened right after when I went to light the barbecue for some good meaty hamburgers, found the decapitated foot (hoof, whatever) with a length of bone attached to it of a cow (I presume) sitting on the grill. The thoughts that went through my mind at that moment were, "Hmm, that seems out of place, I don't think that is supposed to be there" and I proceeded to light the barbecue only to turn it off again seconds later when I realized what it actually was on the grill. I then laughed and made bad puns about what that extra flavor in the burgers was and wondered what the truth was behind the mysterious decapitated leg. Actually quite funny. At least it wasn't bloody or anything.

Summary in seven words: Decapitated foot on barbecue grill. Ate anyways.

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Wednesday, April 14, 2004

My accounting final exam today went as would lack of water would with a fish: painful, agonizing, death. The only consolation is that I was not the only one to think that, but rather everyone I talked to seemed to think it was the worst exam of all time/space, and that I won't be the only one to do poorly on it (my teacher marks on the bell curve so perhaps it won't end up so bad). Sorry, you won't hear too much from me in the next week and a half because I'll be studying for my other 4 exams which will hopefully go a bit smoother. Also, my creativity levels have dropped significantly since I have been studying more so my posts will hopefully resume their previous vigor when exams are over and if not, meh, I tried.

Summary in seven words: I apologize for the inconvenience. No, really.

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Monday, April 12, 2004

I have seen the other side, and I have quite enjoyed it. I will go there again, if I have the time, money and/or energy to go. Of what am I speaking? I have no idea. If you thought you did, I recommend consulting a psychiatrist and then do exactly the opposite of what he/she says. I am feeling rather odd this evening. Perhaps it has something to do with the MSN conversation I had earlier with someone who refuses to divulge their name, but has turned out to be a communist who spends an hour and a half each morning following clues of varying difficulty to find the peanut butter. Very odd conversation indeed. I think I will go to bed now. Tomorrow will be a good day, involving much guitar playing and procrastinating (I know myself).

Summary in seven words: Complete and utter nonsense, all of it.

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Sunday, April 11, 2004

I just watched a discussion, via satellite in typical newsy program fashion, about those two islands in the Caribbean, Turks and Caicos, and I must say that I am completely for the idea if they are for it. Our two leaders are supposed to have talks sometime soon to discuss things (who knows what that actually means). There was one lady in the discussion who was all heated in her arguments, which may be the reason that they made little sense, who kept interrupting people, even yelling. That is not the way it should be done and more than once she was told to keep quiet and let the others speak (which I found very funny). It irks me when people are so opinionated about something that they feel the need to behave rudely, obnoxiously and irrationally towards the other members of the discussion (I was amazed at how loaded some of the questions she had for the others were).

I see it this way: If they want to join our great country, let them. It would be great to have a tropical province to vacation in (no currency conversions, no exhaustive security checks, no passports ...), and all but one of the people I have discussed it with agree. This particular person has supposedly been there and reports that it is just a hunk of coral in the middle of the ocean. To that I say, at least it is a hot piece of coral with beaches and water above ten degrees! I would only be in favour if the people of Turks and Caicos want to go through with it. It would be a challenge, but a rewarding one in my view. If you know something about this that I don't, please let me know.

Summary in seven words: Turks and Caicos joining, perhaps. Sam -> Beach.

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Friday, April 09, 2004

Grammar God!
You are a GRAMMAR GOD!


If your mission in life is not already to
preserve the English tongue, it should be.
Congratulations and thank you!


How grammatically sound are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

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Well, most of the snow is gone again, but not before I got some uber great pictures taken of some crocus buds popping out of the snow (true to Canadian form I am still talking about the weather). Since it was so nice outside, and by nice I mean above minus fifteen, I decided to walk to school, mostly because it was the only way to get there due to my lack of car, lack of money situation. I was walking along the bike path, a very wooded area next to the golf course, when the trees started to creak. I am no stranger to walking in the woods in all seasons but this was a new experience for me, quite amusing, scary and curiosity all at once. I don't know if that has ever happened to you before, or if you experienced it rather, but I thought those noises only occurred from movies like lord of the rings and in dense forests like fangorn. As this was neither, and not even a somewhat dense forest, I was wondering which of the seventeen dozen trees in view was about to topple. I was mediocrely disappointed when none did in my walk through the creaking forest. Perhaps they do that all the time and I just have not noticed before, though that seems unlikely as I walk alone down that path all the time and have never heard it before. In any case it was an interesting, or at least not ablsolutely mind-numbingly dull, event.

Summary in seven words: Creaking trees, will they topple? Unfortunately not.

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Wednesday, April 07, 2004

The snow is melting again, the temperature is pleasant, all my essays are done and it is the last day of classes. I am feeling quite happy. I had my first Easter chocolate today and the teacher of my history class gave us cookies, yay. Only in a small university would that ever happen, at least I think it would though I have never been to an uber huge university nor do I feel the compulsion to. They were the kind my grandmother eats, but hey, they were still cookies.

Summary in seven words: Nothing of note, no nothing at all.

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Monday, April 05, 2004

I thought we had a deal with Mother Nature! Everything was going great, spring was coming, the plants were popping up, all the snow was melting and had nearly vanished, the weather was getting warmer, hovering around 10 degrees (that is Celsius for you Americans out there). Then we were betrayed. Four inches of the white stuff was dumped on our doorstep, not anthrax for you Americans out there, but snow. The temperature has turned sub-zero and this particular Sam is not happy about it. Perhaps Mother Nature is pissed off at us because we said we were going to recycle, cut our pollution levels ..., and then promptly made an effort that could only be considered mediocre at best. An when dealing out her riteous, in her eyes it may be, retribution she decides to dump a load on us and make it cold again, all out of spite. Or perhaps it was to prove those people who still think that global warming is coming for us and will steal our babies, burn our houses, make the Americans swarm up here in droves, etc. that they are wrong, and that globabl warming is in fact just something made up, with little scientific evidence to back it up and much that doens't, by the media, or perhaps some crackpot theorist looking to see how gullible the world is. In any case, I don't think spring is supposed to be like this.

Summary in seven words: Four inches of snow, Mother Nature's pissed.

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Sunday, April 04, 2004

Class today was death. The prof gave us our tests back and the average was 46 (which thankfully I did better, a pass, but not by too much). He let us go an hour early because he probably wanted to go home and watch TV or experiment with accounting procedures, I couldn't begin to guess which though I would strangely like to think the latter.

Song of the week (yes it is that good, in my opinion that is): The Beautiful Letdown by Switchfoot.

Summary in seven words: Class on sunday = death. Uber good song.

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Saturday, April 03, 2004

I will give you seven guesses as to what I am supposed to be doing now. If you guessed blogging, you are almost, but not quite, the farthest away possible from the truth. If you guessed Accounting homework, you would be right as the term paper is due tomorrow (yes, that's right, on SUNDAY!) because we have a make up class in the afternoon because of the strike, or second spring break, whichever you prefer (I prefer the second because that is essentially what it was. Never did anyone, on TV or otherwise, ever discuss their plans for the strike without the word "party" or "drinking" coming up once or several times; my school is a party school alright). So I will get back to, or rather begin, it.

Summary in seven words: Procrastinating yet again, sentences inside brackets, taboo?

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Thursday, April 01, 2004

Worst April fools prank ever that I have witnessed went as follows. I was over at a friends house watching football many years ago (Dallas vs. San Francisco I think but honestly couldn't care less), I think I was in grade 8. My friend decides to get up and get some cookies upstairs, so out of the blue, his brother (who was watching the game with us, he didn't just pop out of nowhere as exciting as that would have been) walks over to where he was sitting and pours his whole glass of milk on the seat of the couch, turns to me, snickers, goes back and sits down and says something that I wasn't really listening to, being so dumbstruck that he would go and pour a glass of milk on his couch in the first place. You can probably guess what happened next, and if not, you can probably imagine something that was much more exciting to replace the absent event.

This brother (younger I should probably add) did many other crazy things to the particular brother (with little to no cause that I could tell) that was my friend in my viewing that any reasonably competent psychiatrist would have most likely labeled as psychosasic behavior (mostly because they like to make up words to describe things that are particularly abnormal) such as throwing steak knives at him (with actual intent, surprisingly), attempted beatings with broomsticks and hockey equipment, and many projectiles of various shapes and sizes being maliciously hoisted in his general direction. Whether or not this is normal behavior among brothers is beyond my limited understanding as I have only one sister, who did throw a chair at me once. Hmmm a trend among younger siblings?

Summary in seven words: Crazy younger siblings and their antics. Parenthesis.

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A friend told me the other day that he had the privilege of eating dolphin while on vacation a while back and apparently it is one of the best tasting meals that he has ever had (I have tasted his wife's cooking too, so that is no small feat in itself). I was telling another friend about this and how I would like to try this supposed delicious meal someday when I was told that dolphins actually "have physiologically more faculties to IMAGINE and VISUALIZE than humans". This I found fascinating. He then goes on to say, "It is possible they lead a very active SPIRITUAL life, in which case I'd come to question Man's superiority." Douglas Adams did the same thing, but whether or not his was an actual opinion written up in a book to entertain, or if it was simply the concoction of a brilliant mind I cannot say. What I will say, however, is that I know virtually nothing about the subject and I would not turn up a plate of dolphin meat if one set it in front of me (that is more because I like to eat and I especially like to try new things, especially seafood).

I am uber tired at the moment, yet somehow I can't bring myself to go to sleep (probably psychological for doing poorly on an accounting test today, not that it has ever happened before). I have lost all motor skills such that I can't even play coherent guitar anymore if such a thing were possible to begin with.

Summary in seven words: Dolphin more imaginative? They don't write blogs!

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